


Back To Your Heart

by Jaseraie



Category: Backstreet Boys
Genre: Alternate Universe, Explicit Sexual Content, F/M
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2012-07-02
Updated: 2013-10-21
Packaged: 2017-11-09 00:29:44
Rating: Explicit
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings, No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 26
Words: 29,713
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/449222
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/Jaseraie/pseuds/Jaseraie
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>CJ is finally getting to spend some family time with her brothers. But family time with her brothers means going on tour with the Backstreet Boys. But she's never met Nick... Or has she?</p><p> </p><p>The title comes from the Backstreet Boys song, "Back To Your Heart"</p><p>This is a complete work of fiction. I do not know the Backstreet Boys. I don't own them either. I didn't make any money off of this.</p>
            </blockquote>





	1. Prologue/Chapter 1

PROLOGUE  
At 5 years old, Jaseraie was a very lucky girl. She had 4 older brothers who cared for her and looked out for her. She had a best friend who was like a 6th twin brother. Then there was the boy down the street, who she only knew as Carrot, that she had a puppy crush on. He was a sweet little blonde boy who loved to play tricks on her, and then kiss her to apologize for being mean. What he didn't know was that she stopped being upset a long time ago.

But her whole world was turning upside down. She just found out she was moving. Her whole family was moving. So she went over to her best friend, Adam's house. They cried and cried. "I promise you Jassy, we'll stay friends forever. We'll call each other and stuff." They hugged and Jaseraie ran down the street to Carrot's house. "Carrot! Carrot! I'm moving. I don't wanna go!!! Can I stay here with you?" Carrot laughed smiled and laughed at her. "Listen Little Princess. If you stay with me all your brothers would miss you. Why would you want to do that to them? Why have 4 people miss you, instead of one?" He wiped the tears from her eyes. "But I promise you, Little Princess, we'll see each other again. I don't know when.. but we will one day." he kissed her forehead and walked her back home.

Jaseraie and her family moved the next day. She watched out the window as the car pulled away from their street. "One day Carrot...."

 

CHAPTER 1  
At 28 years old, Jaseraie was still pretty lucky. She was a beautiful girl. She had long, wavy, brown hair. She had almost emerald green, cat-shaped eyes with a heart shaped face and an olive complexion. She had managed to stay close to Adam... who grew up to be the world famous Adam Lambert. She called him Al. Her brothers had grown up to be known as 4 of the 5 Backstreet Boys; Kevin, Howie, Brian, and AJ. The 5 of them had all changed their last names for career purposes. They didn't want to be the next Osmands or Baldwins or something.

Jaseraie even had her own singing career now. She was CJ Carter, overnight YouTube sensation. But it made it VERY hard for family get togethers. That is why CJ was so happy to be going on tour with the Backstreet Boys. Almost an entire year with her brothers. The tour schedule was close to Adam's. So she would be able to see him every couple weeks. Hopefully she could talk to him more than that. Texting was an AWESOME invention.

There was only one thing CJ was worried about. That was Nick. She'd never really been around him. She didn't know anything except for what was public knowledge and what her brothers had told her. 

"This is going to be the best your ever," she said as she packed her clothes quickly and ran down to the taxi waiting for her. The taxi took her to the hotel where she was supposed to meet the boys... and Adam. She and Adam were meeting for lunch before she left.

Adam was waiting outside for her. She ran up to him and hugged him. "Girl you look hot! If only I could find it in me to like girls... You'd be at the top of my list." 

CJ laughed. He was always saying things like that. "Yea, yea. But you just like guys too damn much. Speaking of boys, do you think my brothers are going to trip shit over this outfit?" 

Adam looked up and down at her outfit: soft-skin black leather pants, knee high black leather boots, a white spaghetti strap tank top and a black heart choker. "Yes. Definitely going to trip shit!. But don't worry about it. They're supposed to. It's in their job description as older brothers!" 

"So, where to Al? Your turn to pick lunch." 

"Nope, Jassy. Still your turn. I picked twice in a row. So you pick." 

"Ok then. Let's head east and see what we can find." 

An hour later, Adam and CJ made their way back towards the hotel. 

"You know, it's going to be weird not seeing you or talking to you everyday, Jassy. But I'll call you as much as I can. And I'll text you every day." 

CJ wrapped her arm around his waist. "I know sweetie. We'll make it work!"

They turned the corner to find Brian, AJ, and Howie standing between the hotel and the bus. 

"Love you Al. Call me soon!" She kissed his cheek and ran off to her brothers. "Hey guys! I'm so happy to see you. Guys? Hello? Boys?" 

They were all staring at her. AJ finally snapped out of it long enough to say something. "J. Wow. Look at you. Go put some damn clothes on! I mean, it's so great to see you too. Now, go put some damn clothes on!" 

CJ walked over to AJ and hugged him. "I've missed you the most!" 

She walked over to Brian and Howie in turn and hugged them then walked back to AJ. "Well, you already packed my stuff away. So tough luck!" She smiled sweetly and leaned up against the bus.

Nick walked off the bus. "So where is this sister of yours? Can't we just leave without.... Hello! I'm Nick." He looked up and down CJ's backside. "I'm the cutest and the ONLY available Backstreet Boy." He gave a toothy grin as CJ turned around. 

"Hi. I'm CJ. I'm their sister so I don't want to hook up with them anyway. So, shall we be going?"

Nick's jaw dropped. "You... you're their... sister? That can't be! You're too hot!" Brian and Howie walked onto the bus. AJ walked up to CJ, put his arm around her shoulders and pulled her onto the bus. "Don't mind Nick, sis. He's a horny teenager in a 30 year old man's body." 

CJ giggled and turned back to find Nick still staring. "So Nick, are you coming with or do we need to donate you to the city as a statue?" Nick shook his head a bit and followed her onto the bus.


	2. Chapter 2

CJ went to her room at the back of the bus and collapsed on the bed. "This is gonna be great." Her mind wandered to Al. It really was going to take time getting used to not seeing or calling him every day. "Thankfully I can text him!" She grabbed her phone and texted him a quick note. She slowly let her mind drift and soon fell asleep.

She woke up to Brian at her side. "Hey you! I thought you'd never wake up. I have been in here 10 minutes trying to wake you up. Were you doing that fake sleeping thing again?" CJ rubbed her eyes and realized her phone was on her stomach. She looked back over at Brian. "Sorry Big B. I didn't realize I fell asleep. What's going on anyway?" Brian laughed at her. "You really were asleep, huh? We're at the hotel. It's time to go inside." CJ got up and walked with Brian off the bus to the door of their hotel.

As they were getting off the bus Howie came running out to them. "Guys, there's a slight glitch in the reservation. Whoever made it told them we had 4 guys, 4 girls and the 2 kids. But failed to tell them that one guy and one girl needed their own rooms. So CJ and Nick are supposed to share a room. A 1 bed room at that." Brian and CJ stared at Howie. Howie continued, "Also, they hotel is COMPLETELY booked. So there's not even an extra room to get." Brian looked at Howie. "How could this happen? We were doing everything we could to prevent this from happening." "I know B. That's why AJ offered to switch with CJ if she so chooses. But she is the one who has to make the decision." CJ hated feeling like a child, and Brian and Howie always did know how to make her feel like a child. But she knew it was because they loved her and were worried. So she just walked into the hotel, leaving them to their conversation.

As she walked into the hotel, she saw AJ and Nick arguing in front of the elevator. She could tell that it was getting kinda nasty. "She's a big girl and doesn't need her big brother to..." "perverted player hitting on a sweet girl..." She could hear them as she got closer. They two guys both spotted CJ at the same time and immediately stopped yelling at each other. "Hey guys. Where are the rooms?" Nick smiled at her. "We have the entire top floor to ourselves... Well the 10 of us have the floor to ourselves." AJ stepped in front of Nick. "J, I will switch with You if you want me to. You don't have to stay with Nick. Rochelle would love to spend some time catching up with you. So just say the word and he will be denied!" 

CJ had to laugh at AJ. She did love it when AJ or the others tried to be big brother protective. "Thanks AJ, but it's fine. We can leave it the way it is. Besides, we're all adults here. There are couches and stuff. Nick and I will make it work. If he can't then I know where you guys are and can switch then. Isn't that right Nick?" Nick just nodded and smiled. "I'll be fine." CJ kissed AJ on the cheek and got onto the elevator that had just arrived. AJ and Nick followed her. "You always did have a good head on your shoulders"

Soon everyone was in their rooms and settled in. Howie walked to CJ and Nick's room and knocked on the door. CJ answered. "Hey sis. We're all supposed to meet up for dinner at 6 pm. That's 3 hours until you two need to be downstairs in the lobby. So, just have fun and relax until then, ok?" Howie leaned in and hugged CJ. It's so great to have you with us." He turned and whispered in her ear, "If he gets to be too much for you, we're all just a few doors away. We'll be happy to help! Just come and get one of us." CJ just smiled and pushed him out the door. "Bye Howie!" She closed the door on him.

She walked back into the room and saw Nick sitting on the bed playing Halo. She just stood there watching him with a weird fascination. She's never been so enthralled watching a guy play video games before. She walked and sat on the bed. Nick just stared at the screen. So CJ decided to mess with him. After all, she needed some entertainment too, right? She slowly scooted towards him and pushed him off the edge of the bed. He landed on the floor with a thud, and then looked up and stared at her. "Sorry, man. I didn't see you there. Are you ok?" She flashed him a sweet smile.

Nick kept staring at her. He didn't know what to do about this girl. She was unlike any girl he'd ever met. She was so beautiful and girly, and at the same time she could act just like one of the guys. She was just like her brothers in a way. "You pushed me off the bed... on PURPOSE! I was in the middle of my game, and you pushed me!!" He watched her laugh. She wrinkled her nose. "Yea? What if I did? What are you going to do about it?" Nick smiled at her. "One thing you need to know about me... NEVER ask me what I'm gonna do about something. Because then I ALWAYS do!" He smiled again and then he got up and tackled her, pinning her hands to the bed.

CJ couldn't believe it. No one had ever fought back. Not even AJ! So she smiled at him. "You think you've won, huh? You need to remember that I was raised around a bunch of guys and know how to put up a fight" She adjusted herself under him enough so that she was able to flip him over and pin him. She immediately hopped off him and ran away. Nick got up and chased her around the room. CJ had made a full lap around the room when she tripped on the bed leg and fell onto the bed. Nick ran over and pinned her again, tightly this time. He straddled her to help keep her pinned too. "Ha ha. I got you again." He stared into her eyes and thought he saw something familiar.

CJ lay there watching him, trying to figure out why it was so easy being around a guy she's never met. She'd always had a hard time opening up and being herself around guys before. Why was he so special? Why was she so comfortable around him?

Nick was staring at her. She looked sorta beautiful laying there under him, looking helpless. He had to admit, he liked the idea of her beneath her. He had to kiss her. He started leaning in towards her. CJ closed her eyes waiting for him.

*RING* *RING*

They both jumped. CJ scrambled out from under Nick so she could grab her cell phone. "It's Adam!" She answered the phone. "Hey Al! What's going on? Nope, I wasn't doing anything." She stood up and walked into the other section of the room. Nick just watched her, feeling disappointed. "What the hell am I doing? She's their sister! I don't even know her!" He decided to go back to playing Halo.


	3. Chapter 3

CJ Looked into the other room. "Yea. Sorry Al. You'd never believe what just ALMOST happened. No, not with them... With Nick!" She started pacing. "No, I'm rooming with him. A mess up in the reservation. Yes, Al. I know the man is hot.... So, how's your room? OK, I'll text details later. Bye, Sweetie."

Nick watched her hang up her phone. She was a cute shade of pink. He knew she kept looking over. It was cute that she was acting so nervous. But she was their sister. "What the hell am I thinking? Oh well." He turned off the game and went to take a shower.

"I HAVE to get out of this room. I know, I'll go hang out with Rochelle. That should keep my mind off of things." She waited until she heard the shower turn on, then went down the hallway and knocked on AJ's door. He opened the door and looked mad. "What did the pervert do now?" CJ Smiled. "Nothing. He was perfectly lovely. He's in the shower and I'm bored and Al has sound check. So... here I am. I thought Rochelle might wanna do some window shopping online!" AJ laughed at her. "You're obsessed with shopping How many pairs of boots do you have now?" "Not enough, bro. And it's only window shopping. Now move over and go get Rochelle please!" AJ laughed down the hallway as he went to find Rochelle. CJ walked into the room and sat down on the couch. Rochelle came running out and plopped down next to CJ and hugged her. "Good to see you chica! So what's for window shopping? Boots?" CJ rolled her eyes. "Everyone assumes it's boots! But no, not boots. If for no other reason than to prove your man wrong!" They both giggled. "So if not boots, how about jewelry?" "Works for me!"

Nick had tried all the other doors. So CJ had to be in with AJ and Rochelle. Nick knew AJ and CJ were very close from listening to him talk about her. The JJ twins, been attached at the hip since CJ could walk... or so he'd heard. AJ answered the door and scowled at him. "I wondered how long it was gonna take you." "Relax man. I just wanted to chill! An empty room is too much chill. Can I come in?" He saw AJ's face lighten up a bit. "Sure man. But let's leave the girls alone. They're off in their own little shiny world. Women and jewelry!" Nick walked into the room and followed AJ into the kitchenette. "What can I getcha Nick?" "A slice of pizza. I'm starved!" AJ laughed. "As always. But we're supposed to go to dinner in about an hour, so pick again!" Nick pouted. "Fine, gimme a Pepsi." AJ reached into the fridge, grabbed two and tossed one at Nick. "Thanks AJ."

AJ stood across from Nick trying to read him. "So, Nick," He took a sip of his Pepsi, "What are your intentions with my sister?" "What the hell, man?! I've known her... not even a day!" "Yes, Nick. But I know you. So, I will ask you again... What are your intentions? I'm not saying you'll get anywhere but it would be nice to have a heads up as to what to expect." He grinned at Nick. "AJ man, give me a little credit. She's your sister. Not just yours, ALL of you guys's sister." He arched his eyebrow at Nick. "OK, I have to admit, she's hot. And yea, I'd like to give her.... I mean it a go with her. But dude, you three scare me a bit." He laughed. "Good. I'm glad." He just smiled at Nick.

CJ looked at the time. "WOW! It's 5:45. We need to get going. Wouldn't Howie love it if we were all ready and ahead of time?" Rochelle laughed. "Yea, he'd be delighted!" CJ closed the laptop and the two girls walked into the kitchenette. "AJ, get your cute little ass ready to go." "Hey Monkey. We were getting ready to head down in a minute." CJ looked at Nick and turned around and walked out of the room towards the elevator. She went to text Adam and realized her phone was missing. "Shit. Shit. Shit!" She patted herself trying to find it. "Where'd it go?" She looked over and a hand was holding it. "Thanks girl! I.... Oh. Hi Nick. Wow... ummm nice hands!" She giggled. "You left this on the couch. I told them I'd get it to you since I was heading down anyway. So, can I walk downstairs?" "I guess since we're going to the same place... sure. Why not?"  
Previous


	4. Chapter 4

They walked in silence. When they got to the lobby Nick finally spoke up. "Listen, CJ. I'm sorry. I got a little carried away and..." He saw everyone else coming off the elevator, so he stopped talking again. They ate dinner in silence while everyone else talked. When they were at sound check, they barely acknowledged each other.

AJ was getting worried. It wasn't like either one of them to be so quiet. So he decided to go talk to CJ first. She was more likely to spill the beans. "Hey, J. What's up with you? You've been so quiet. I usually can't get you to shut up!" He smiled at her as he watched her shift uncomfortably. "I'm just tired, and I think I'm a little Adam-sick. I miss him a lot." AJ walked up to her and hugged her. "So it has nothing to do with Nick and why you've both been acting strange?" She gave him her sweet puppy look. "Nah. He's probably just pouting 'cause I made him mess up on Halo. I'm just Adam-sick." He didn't believe her, but there wasn't much point to going on with the conversation. First because she was so stubborn. Second, she was about to go on stage. So AJ decided to try and get Nick to talk.

Nick stood backstage off to the side and watched CJ go on and open the show. She really was amazing to watch. AJ came over and watched CJ with him. "Imagine hearing her sing like that at about 10 years old!" Nick smiled at AJ. "So, Nick. Do you have ANY idea why my sister has been so quiet tonight?" Uh-oh, he thought. Does AJ know something? "Not a clue man. But did you know she pushed me off the bed earlier and made me mess up on Halo? And DAMN, she did it on purpose too!" AJ laughed. "I guess she was right... at least about you. You're being quiet 'cause of a game. I guess that makes sense. Alright, well I guess I should go and start getting ready. Enjoy the show. See ya soon." Nick waved at AJ and turned back to watch CJ. He was enthralled.

CJ got done on stage and was on a massive adrenaline high as she danced to her dressing room. She looked at her phone and saw 20 texts and a voicemail. "Wow, Al. What am I gonna do with you? You've gone overboard." She checked her voicemail first, and was surprised to hear Kevin's voice. "Hey, little J. I called to wish you good luck on your performance tonight, but you're probably already bon stage. So I hope you had fun. I wish I could've been there tonight. I'll try to get down to a show soon. Kristen and Mason send their love. Talk to you soon. Oh and one more thing. If Nick gets to be too much of a pest... Call me and I'll come squish him! Ha ha. Love you sis. Bye!" She smiled. "That's sweet. And you'll have to get in line for Nick squishing." She started to change and turned on the speaker to listen to the show on stage. She texted Al back while sprawling out on the couch. She drifted off to sleep to the sound of Backstreet fans screaming.


	5. Chapter 5

AJ had asked Nick to let CJ know they were headed back to the hotel for the night. They'd be leaving in he morning about noon. "We're trusting you to behave like a gentleman, Nick!" He laughed at the memory. "Like I'd take a chance on getting my ass kicked by you all." He knocked on CJ's dressing room door, but there was no answer. He knocked again, still no answer. "She's probably already left, but just in case..." He opened the door and saw CJ asleep on the couch with nothing but a T-shirt and a thong on. His eyes almost popped out of his head. "WOW!!" Then he noticed her phone on her stomach. "Aw. Poor thing was tuckered out." He grabbed a skirt from the floor and managed to get it on her without waking her up. He grabbed her phone and put it in his jeans pocket. "Can't lose that, now can we?" He scooped her up and cradled her in his arms. "She looks so sweet and innocent." She snuggled into his chest, which made him blush. "That doesn't happen a lot." He was almost outside when he heard her mumbling in her sleep. "Carrot. I want Carrot. Give me Carrot." He laughed. "She must really like carrots." As he said it, he felt a pang of sadness, but he wasn't sure why. He carried her to the hotel and took her up to their room and laid her out on the bed. He went into the other room and laid down on the couch. "What the hell was that feeling for?"

CJ woke up and didn't know where she was. She looked around and saw the clock. "2:45 am? What the hell?!" She remembered the concert, but how did she get back to her room? "Where's my phone? Oh no!" She sat up and frantically started searching for it. "Where the HELL is my phone?!" she yelled. She saw Nick enter the room looking extremely sexy. She stopped and just stared at him. He had no shirt on. His hair was all tossed around, and his jeans were unbuttoned and hung open just a bit. "Ooh, yummy." "what did you say?" "Oh, um I was looking for my phone. Have you seen it?" She watched him reach into his jeans pocket, causing them to fall slightly. He pulled out her phone. "I didn't want you to lose it." He smiled a tired smile at her.

Nick couldn't believe how gorgeous CJ was with bed head hair. He watched her almost float towards him and take the phone from his hands. "Oh, thank you so much. That was very nice of you." She stood up on her tippy toes and kissed his cheek then walked over and sat back down on the bed. He felt a warm sensation go down his body. "Uh. Yea. No problem." What was is about this girl? The more time he spent with her, the more he felt weak in the knees and almost possessive over her. He had an urge to wrap her in his arms and to never let her go. He didn't want to let her go. But he'd only known her a day! He walked over and sat next to her on the bed. "I'm sorry if you have a massive backlog of Adam texts. But you had fallen asleep in the dressing room. I didn't want to wake you, so I carried you to the hotel and let you sleep. I thought your phone would just wake you up. The damn thing kept vibrating while I was trying to fall asleep." She was blushing. "You carried me here?" He nodded.

CJ scooted closer to him and hugged him. "Thank you. You have to be the sweetest guy I know... besides Al and my brothers of course." He smiled at her. It was a beautiful smile. "Anyway, we should probably try and get back to sleep. If you want, you can sleep in here with me. I mean you did carry me back here. Besides it's a king size bed.. There's enough room for at least 3 people to sleep comfortably, and we're both adults. So I can see no reason why we shouldn't be able to share the bed." She watched him as he thought about it. "But what about..." "Nick, let me deal with my brothers, ok?" She crawled over to the other side of the bed. "So that settles it then. Goodnight Nick." He nodded at her and laid down on his back. She turned onto her side and watched him. He was asleep almost instantly. She closed her eyes and feel asleep too.  
Previous


	6. Chapter 6

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Sex Scene

Nick woke up to the feel of a hand on him. He looked over and saw CJ was cuddled up next to him with her hand on his chest. He let out a soft moan. Her touch set him on fire. She cuddled in closer, putting her head on his shoulder. Her heard her whispering, "Carrot? Carrot I'm so sorry. There's someone else." He smiled. "Am I your someone else?" CJ smiled in her sleep. "Nick, shush. Just don't tell." He shifted so he could lean down and kiss her forehead. He felt her hand slowly start to move down his chest. He moaned again. "Oh man. I'm sooo gonna get my ass kicked!" CJ's hand moved lower still until it has below his navel. "What are you doing to me CJ?" He'd never had a reaction like this before, to anyone.

CJ opened her eyes and could hear Nick breathing rapidly. Then she felt his skin under her hand. He felt so warm. She could feel the soft little hairs around his navel, and she realized where her hand was. She looked up at Nick, who was already staring at her. "Hi." He just smiled, nervously. She looked down his chest and started making figure 8's with her finger around his belly button and playing with the hair around it. She looked back at Nick. She felt this sudden need to kiss him everywhere. She moved herself up just enough so that she could look him in the eyes. When she looked at him, he had a deep, penetrating, soulful look. She felt almost naked, like he could see all of her. She closed her eyes, leaned over and brushed his lips with hers, softly like a whisper. When she opened her eyes, Nick was rigid. "I... I'm sorry Nick. I don't know what's come over me. I should have asked. I'm sorry." "Don't be." He leaned up, pulled her face close, and kissed her deeply. CJ's mind was whirling. Everything was spinning. When they finally pulled back she felt like she had lost all control of herself. She was his to do with as he pleased. She leaned down and kissed his neck. She kissed down his chest, half an inch at a time.

Nick didn't know if he was dreaming or not. But if he was, he didn't want to wake up. CJ's lips were like velvet running down his body and back up. He was losing his willpower one kiss at a time. The bulge in his pants felt like it was going to break the zipper. Screw her brothers and damn their threats. He had to have her. He had to feel her, and damned if he wasn't going to! He stopped her kisses and pulled her up so he could look into her eyes. He leaned up and kissed her long, needingly, and passionately. Without breaking their kiss, he flipped her over onto her back. It was his turn now. He pulled her shirt off exposing her breasts. He kissed her cheek, then her chin, then the curve of her neck. He licked down to her breasts and made sure to kiss each nipple. He slowly worked down, making sure to taste every bit of her flesh. When he got to her "V' he moved to her thighs, kissing and nuzzling them. He kissed down to her toes and back up her other leg. When he got to her thigh, he nudged them to open with his nose and by nipping at the soft flesh. She obediently opened up to him. He continued upwards, kissing and tasting her until he was once more looking into her eyes. This time though, he was grinding his bulge into her forbidden area. She hissed in pleasure. He could hardly control himself, knowing that just a layer of clothes was all that separated them. He caresses her face and moved his hand over her breasts and down her side to the thin strap that was holding her thong in place. He grabbed it and pulled until it snapped. Then he snapped the other side and the front fell forward, exposing her to his viewing and touching pleasure. He looked back into her eyes and gave his most seductive smile.

CJ wrapped her arms around Nick. She traced figure 8's on his back. She moved her hands slowly down his back, and then gently scratched back up it while watching him and arch his back and roll his eyes back into his head. She sat herself up slightly and moved her hands around to his front and down his pants. She softly squeezed the bulge in his pants, unzipped his jeans, and pushed them down his leg onto his thigh, exposing all of him to her. He was just inches away from her. She wrapped her legs around his waist, pulling him closer to her. With one leg she pushed his jeans the rest of the way off of him. She leaned up and kissed him while pulling her leg back up, pulled his back down, pulling him on top of her. She wiggled herself down slowly until she could feel his bulge touch her. She let out a soft moan in his ear and he rubbed up against her, causing him to moan. "CJ, are you sure? I don't want to.... I mean I want to... GOD do I want to. But if you're uncomfortable..." She flipped him over onto his back, as he had done earlier. She sat just below him, rubbing herself against him... teasing him, making him thrust up. She placed her hands at the top of his chest and scratched down while rubbing up against him. He sucked in and kissed in total pleasure. She pushed herself as close to his member as possible, then leaned down to his ear and whispered, "Oh, Nick. I'm sure!" She nipped his ear lobe and sat back up.

Nick flipped CJ back onto her back. He kissed her lips then opened his eyes and watched her. He gazed into her eyes as he slowly and gently entered her. She arched her back and moaned "Oh, Nick!" He pulled out gently and started increasing his speed. He didn't want to hurt her, and he wanted to make this last. She felt so good, almost too good. He started increasing his speed every few thrusts. He could feel her rolling her hips with his rhythm. She made soft little gasps or moans with every thrust into her. He knew she really was enjoying it from watching her try to bite her lip to keep quiet and having no luck. She made it so hard not to pound into her. So he leaned down and kissed her while pushing into her. She moaned through his kisses. She was scratching at his back again. She wrapped her legs around him and Nick could feel her hips quickening. She wanted him to go faster. He was happy to oblige. He quickened his pace, taking his hands and lacing his fingers in hers. He leaned down and started kissing her neck, never straying from his rhythm.

CJ could hardly breathe. Nick felt so good. She couldn't remember anything like this before. She opened her eyes and watched him. He was staring at her with warm eyes. She smiled and flipped him back over. He looked shocked. She straddled him and lowered herself onto him. He let out a loud moan. She started circling her hips on him and scratching at his chest. It made him thrust up higher. Nick's breathing was getting erratic and he seemed to be losing control of himself. It wouldn't be long now. So CJ quickened a bit and leaned down and started kissing his chest. The added pressure made Nick groan and thrust harder. Nick grabbed her face and pulled it to his. He kissed her hard and deep. He let out a guttural moan in her mouth and thrusted harder a few more times. "Oh, Nick. I'm..." They both cried out in pleasure and CJ collapsed onto his chest, letting all her weight rest on him. He wrapped his arms around her and stroked her back. After a few minutes, CJ rolled over onto the bed, cuddling up as close as she could to Nick and placed her head on his shoulder. "Goodnight Nick." She closed her eyes and had one thought cross her mind before she drifted off to sleep, "I sure hope my brothers didn't hear that!"

Nick watched CJ sleep for a few moments. "I'm a dead man unless this hotel has thick walls. But I'll die a happy, happy man. And CJ, you were so worth it." He wrapped his arms around CJ, closed his eyes, and he too was soon asleep.


	7. Chapter 7

Nick woke up to the sound of the alarm clock.He opened his eyes and looked at the empty bed next to him. "Damn. That was one hell of a dream. It was so real too!" He sat up to check on how much he had to pick up the room, when he saw CJ coming out of the bathroom with nothing but a towel on. She was soaking wet. "Wow! I mean, did you have a nice shower?" CJ blushed. "Yea. I did thanks. I hope I didn't wake you up with my massively bad version of 'Hey Mr. DJ'." Nick laughed at her. I don't think you could sing it NEARLY as bad as AJ does when he's drunk off his ass! Oh and no, you didn't wake me." "Good. I'm glad. I thought you deserved some sleep." She smiled sweetly at him and went to grab some clothes on top of her suitcase. "Did you see that jacuzzi in the bathroom? I seriously question how sanitary that thing is. There's enough room for 4 or 5 people in that thing!" Nick laughed. He knew what she meant. But he couldn't say he hadn't had his own ideas of what to do in there. "Why wasn't it in my dream then," he wondered to himself. He shrugged it off because he knew he should probably be getting dressed. When he stood up he realized he had no clothes on and looked around. "Wow. VERY real dream!"

CJ saw Nick looking confused. "Wow!," she thought, "What Al wouldn't do for a shot of that ass..." She grabbed her phone and snapped a pictures of Nick's naked butt and sent it in a picture text to Adam with the caption "Happy early/late Birthday. Don't say I never gave you anything! ROFL." She watched Nick for awhile, until she realized what he was doing. "Ummm, your pants are on this side of the bed. I think I saw your shirt on top of the t.v. in the living room area."

Nick slowly turned around and stared at her. After a few seconds he remembered he was naked and covered himself up. "You know Nick, it would might be a good idea to go ahead and get dressed. You never know when one of my brothers is going to come knocking." He scrambled to grab his clothes and get dressed. "I'd say you should change clothes, but I heard you fall sleep in your clothes without changing a lot of times. So you should be fine." She smiled at him, and he didn't know what to think. "Umm, CJ? What..." "Don't worry Nick. I have no intentions of telling anyone what happened last night. I don't want a lecture. You don't need to be hurt. So not a word, not even to Al." She walked over and kissed his cheek. "I just hope the walls are thick." She laughed and walked back to the bathroom to get dressed. Nick stood there staring at the empty hallway. "That wasn't a... I wasn't dreaming?" He looked down and saw a few reed scratch marks on his chest. "OH MY GOD! I am such a dead man!!!" He looked at the time. "10:45? Damn, I gotta hurry!" He ran around and picked up all his things and put them in the suitcase, except his laptop. "I'm probably going to need this." He threw his clothes back on, and took his suitcase over to the door and set it by CJ's. He heard a knock on the door. CJ came running to answer it. "Nick. You look absolutely terrible. You look like the wolf who was caught in the henhouse!" She gave her a nasty look. She ignored him. "Go splash some water on your face and let me get the door. It's ok. I promise." She stood on her tippy toes and kissed his lips softly. "I guess I should have let you think you were dreaming, huh? Well, use that excuse for your lovely red face.... the dream thing, that is." There was another knock on the door. He watched her open the door to Brian. "Come on! Time to go. The bus is waiting. Nick, are you ok man? Are you sick or something?" Nick shook his head, and looked at CJ. "No, I was just telling CJ about the awful dream I had.It freaked me out a bit. I was a vampire and had 5 villagers chasing me out of town with torches and pitchforks." Brian laughed. "yea. I think I would look like you if I had that dream. Listen, we can talk more on the bus if you want. But if we don't get on the bus Howie is going to have a major meltdown. So let's go." Nick headed to the elevator by himself. "One down..."


	8. Chapter 8

CJ followed Brian to the elevator and down into the lobby. She looked at the doors and saw a sea of people screaming and surrounding the bus. Her phone went off with a text from Adam. "How the HELL did you get this? Actually I don't think I wanna know. Thank you. I love it! But how are you going to top this next year? wink wink nudge nudge. LOL!" "Al you pervert! Nick's ass is all you get!" She looked at AJ who had just come down. "Don't worry about the fans, sis. We'll get to the bus. Even if we have to feed Nick to the hungry sharks!" "Actually AJ, I had an idea. You guys get a manager to make it look like they're taking you out the back way. I'll head out to the bus and tell them to head around and look like they're going to the back. The fans will all follow you. The bus will be on the side of the building, and you guys come back out the front and get on the bus." AJ smiled. "Wow. You're good at this." AJ walked over and explained the plan to the rest of them. They all agreed to it. So CJ headed out into the swarm of screaming fans.The people started swarming around her though. They were taking pictures, asking for autographs, pulling at her hair and clothes. She was stuck in the middle of them, and it seemed like she couldn't get out.

Nick was headed back with everyone else when he heard the commotion outside. He looked back and saw CJ getting mobbed by all the people. "DAMN IT!!" He ran out the front doors into the swarm of people. Everyone saw him and started screaming. "Hi everyone. Good to see you. Can you please..." No one was paying attention. "HEY! LET HER THROUGH," he yelled. People started swarming around him and give a little leeway around CJ. Nick watched as CJ got safely on the bus. She turned around and mouthed "Thank You" to him. He nodded. Everyone else came running out with a few security guards who helped make a clear path to the bus. "Nick got on the bus and went back to CJ's room. He walked in and saw her shirt was ripped. He sat down next to her. She looked up at him with tears in her eyes. "Oh, CJ. It was a good plan. It just needed a few extra elements. Like next time we give you a security guard." She nodded. "They got overly excited. They love you." She nodded again. "You're just not used to being in the spotlight." She shook her head and sniffled. He wrapped his arms around her and pulled her close. "It's ok. It'll be ok." He stroked her hair and kissed her forehead. 

"Thanks again, Nick. I promise I won't say anything about this morning either. I need you around. You're like my own personal bodyguard." He smiled at her. "Anytime. And thank you. I do enjoy walking and breathing." The both laughed this time. I should tell you Carrot... I mean..." She looked mortified. "I'm so sorry. I don't know why I just called you that. He's just a... Oh never mind. I wanted to say that Adam thinks you have a HOT ass!" "CJ, Why has Adam seen Nick's ass?" AJ was standing in the doorway. "More importantly, how did you get a picture of Nick's naked ass?" CJ gave AJ her sweet and innocent smile. "Well, Nick thought I was asleep on the couch this morning. He went in to take a shower and was naked. So I snapped a picture to send to Adam. I thought it was better than anything I could ever buy! He's told me forever that I needed to meet Nick so that he could too! So there you have it!" AJ frowned. "We really should talk about this. But right now I just wanted to make sure you're ok." She nodded. "I'm fine. Just shaken up. Nick was nice enough to check on me, And before you ask, he's been a perfect gentleman." She watched as Nick got up and walked out of her room. "I swear AJ, I'm fine." AJ sat down next to her."J, you called Nick, Carrot. I haven't heard you talk about him in a VERY long time. Did you hit your head or something?" She shook her head. "Nah. They pulled my hair, but that's not it. Carrot's been on my mind a lot the last couple days. It was separating from Al. The thought caused me to remember. Then Nick kissed my head right where Carrot used to. Add in the last time I saw Carrot he was consoling me because of a traumatic experience... ok traumatic to a 5 year old. Just a lot for a couple days. I'm ok though. I swear!" AJ nodded and hugged her. "You should rest a bit. We're going to be on the bus for awhile, and it would be a good idea to relax." He kissed her head and left her by herself.

Nick was trying to look busy with the t.v. on."You're not fooling anyone," Brian walked up behind him. "What do you mean?" "You're worried about CJ. We all are. That's a lot to deal with your first day on the job. But you were great getting her out of there like you did. None of us even noticed until you bolted out there. So thanks for that!" Nick nodded. "Yea. Massive fan mobbings are not something you get used to very easily. She did have a good plan though. You need to get her some security. Like a BIG body guard or something!" Brian laughed. "Maybe. But for now I think one of us can stay with her when she's out in public." Nick nodded again. "Maybe take her sightseeing or something?" "Are you volunteering, Nick?" "I... uh... um... sure?" Brian laughed. "It's alright. We'll think of something. I heard from Kev. He and the family are going to meet us in a few days. He wants to see his... What'd he say?... Oh yea. He wants to see his 'Sweet baby J bird sing for a crowd besides us'!" Nick shuddered a bit. "It'll be great to see him. Hey, I'm gonna go check on CJ again... she if she needs anything." He got up and walked to her room.

CJ was sitting on her bed, checking for injuries she hadn't seen yet. Nick knocked on the door. "Hey, can I come in?" She turned around and smiled at Nick. "Sure. Thanks again for helping me out of the crowd." Nick nodded and smiled. "I heard Kevin's coming to meet us in a few days. You must be excited." She nodded. "Yea. It will be great to see him. They just won't tell me when we're meeting him. So, listen... Nick. I don't want last night to affect us. I don't normally do things like that... AT ALL! Let alone with a man I barely know. I don't know exactly why I did it either. It's so unlike me. But I know that it was me as much as you last night. So let's just keep this quiet and we can try to get to know each other and be friends. What do you say?" Nick smiled and nodded. "I'd like that very much. And trust me... I'm not going to say anything. Your brothers scare me, and I value my life. Add Kevin into this scenario... I'd rather not think of what could happen." She smiled. "OK then. Now that that's settled... when do we get to the next city? Where are we going anyway?" Nick gave her a big grin. "New York City tomorrow baby! I LOVE the NYC! So get some rest."


	9. Chapter 9

CJ woke up from a major jerk. "What the hell was that?" Howie came running into her room. "Sorry sis. The bus almost missed the hotel. It stopped really quick. Get up and get your stuff together. Brian's heading in to get us checked in." She nodded sleepily. Nick walked in. "Good morning sleeping beauty. Feel like some sightseeing? I heard you've never been here." She smiled. "sure. Just... just let me get a little bit more woke up. Maybe a shower too." Nick nodded and ran off. She got up and pulled some clean clothes on and put her suitcase together. When she got inside she saw AJ walking towards her. "Hey J. You got your own room this time. So no worries there. Let's head up. We can get your stuff in a bit." AJ smiled as CJ followed him to an elevator. "Here we are, " AJ said as they walked into a huge room. CJ looked around the room. All 10 of them could have stayed in this room and been perfectly comfortable. "we upgraded you to the Presidential Suite... you know, to make up for the last hotel." She smirked. "That one was great" she thought. "You have an entire floor for yourself. The rest of us are only one floor down. Oh, there's one more advantage to this room. You have a private entrance. It's got a private elevator that is code operated to get up here. We'll have you get on the bus before we even leave the building. So the bus will be waiting by your door when we leave, and then it will pull around to get us. OK?" She nodded. AJ kissed her cheek. "If you get too bored, come find us." With that he left. "What the hell am I going to do in this room by myself?"

Nick played bellboy and took all the luggage to their floor. After he got done delivering luggage, he still had CJ's luggage. "Where is she? Hey AJ! Where's CJ staying?" AJ pointed up. "Presidential suite. We felt bad, so we upgraded for her. Go down to the front desk and get the way up." Nick did just that. He entered the code and rode the private elevator up and walked into CJ's room. "CJ, luggage. Are you in here? CJ?" He started walking around the enormous room. "Holy shit!" Just then he heard water running and followed the sound of it. He walked in and saw CJ sitting in a whirlpool, naked. "OH MY GOD! I'm sooo sorry CJ. I wanted to see you... IF you were in your room." He turned around and faced the other direction. "I brought your suitcase. I'm SOOOO sorry!" CJ giggled. "It's alright, Nick. I was just relaxing a bit. I didn't know what else to do by myself. I'll be done in a few minutes. We can hit the city after that if you want." Her phone rang. "It's Al. Give me a minute. " He turned around and watched her. She motioned to a chair on the side of the bathroom. Nick sat down and flashed back to their night in the hotel.

CJ hung up and tried to get Nick's attention. "Nick. Nick?" He seemed to be lost in space. "Hello... Nick?" "Yea... sorry... what?" That was Adam. He's in New York too and wants to know if we want to meet up for pizza." He looked confused. "We? As in you AND me? " She grinned and nodded. "He wants to meet you and see you in person. So he invited the two of us." "But what about your brothers?" "Oh, he already knows them!" She laughed. "We can go have lunch and then go sightseeing. You up for it?" "Sure, why not?" "Good. Then will you hand me that towel?" CJ grazed Nick's hand as she grabbed it and blushed. "Thanks. Um, we need to hurry. He said 12:30 and it's already noon. Luckily he said it's not that far away from here." Nick nodded. "OK then, let me get dressed and we'll be off."

Nick waited by the elevator while CJ got dressed. "OK, let's go." Nick stared at her. "WOW-y! You look..." She giggled. "You're so good for a girl's ego. You know that?" He kept staring at her. She was wearing thigh-high black boots, a black mini skirt, and a sheer, pale blue, midriff peasant top. She had her hair up in a side bun with bangs hanging on either side of her face. "Wow... I mean, let's go." She smiled and walked onto the elevator after Nick. "Just a thought CJ, but shouldn't we tell at least one of your brothers where we're going?" She nodded. "Yea. I'll text AJ after we get to the restaurant. We don't need him getting all paranoid. I love him bunches, but he's a bit overprotective sometimes." Didn't he know it? He was never scared of AJ until it came to his baby sister.


	10. Chapter 10

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> This gives a nice background on CJ & Adam. Hope you enjoy!

CJ and Nick left the hotel and headed around the corner to a little pizzeria. CJ walked inside and looked around. "Jassy! JASSY over here!!!" CJ ran up to Adam and wrapped her arms around his neck. He grabbed onto her and swirled her around. He placed her back on the ground and kissed her on the lips. "Hey beautiful. I tell you what, this has been the longest 3 days of my life!" Adam noticed Nick standing in the doorway and looked over him. "Oh, wow! He came? I'm surprised... happy but surprised! Adam watched as Nick walked over to them. "Jassy, you never did give me details." Nick blushed. "So you're Nick Carter, the unrelated Backstreet Boy. Nice to finally meet you. I'm Adam Lambert, Jassy's Al." "Yea. Good to meet the person who blows up CJ's phone with texts all day." Adam laughed as the 3 of them sat down at the table. CJ and Adam sat down one on side and Nick sat on the other. "Well you have to understand, Jassy and I are very close. We've barely ever been away from each other... except for about a year about 20 years ago. Other than that, we've never really been apart for more than about 12 hours at a time in our lives." "What about school?" CJ and Adam looked at each other then back at Nick. She giggled. "You see Nick, Al and I went to school together too. We even dated for a couple years in high school." Nick's jaw dropped. "yea. That's the general response. It was before he came to terms with himself and who he is. We basically dated until he came out. He came out to me and I went with him when he told his parents. We've stayed friends through it all. I even went and watched him on American Idol. He's my love and my family. I wouldn't change my time with Al for anything." Nick nodded. "I guess I understand. It makes sense. Date someone you trust who will love you no matter what. That's sweet really." Adam nodded. "Yea. But that's not quite it. I really do love Jassy, as much as I possibly can. In high school, I thought it was enough." Nick nodded. "Yea. So I have a question for you CJ. Why do you call him Al?" CJ giggled again. "well, it's his initials isn't it? A is for Adam and L is for Lambert. It makes him Al. I started calling him Al in high school. I told him he was going to be the most famous man in the world one day, and I didn't want people to be hitting me up for an autograph or contact information. So I call him Al, and no one knows who I'm talking about." Nick nodded again. "That actually makes sense." 

Nick watched them together. She was holding onto his arm and laying her head on his shoulder. If he didn't know Adam was gay, he'd SWEAR they were a couple. "So, Nick. What do you think of my Jassy? Isn't she just a little firecracker?" Nick stared at him confused. "Jassy, don't tell me you've behaved yourself?! No pranks? No messing with him? You've been a good girl?" CJ blushed. "See Al, this is why I should have told you..." Adam cocked his eyebrow. "Jassy?" "She knocked me out of the bed the first day we met!" Adam's eyes popped and his jaw dropped!He turned to CJ. "YOU DID WHAT?!?! Oh my God Jassy. No wonder you didn't send me any details on what 'almost happened'!" Adam made air quotes. "That's why you were out of breath!" "No. No. NO Al! That's not what he meant." Adam sat staring between the two of them with a devilish smile. "We had to share a room and he was playing Halo. So I sat on the bed and kept scootching over until I knocked him off the bed." Adam smirked. A waitress came to the table with food and drinks. "I hope you don't mind Jassy. I went ahead and ordered. I got your usual, and extra cheese pizza with a Diet Coke. I got a large pizza though. I heard Nick likes cheese pizza too. "That's fine with me. Thanks Al." Nick nodded. "me too. Thanks man." The 3 of them sat in silence for a few minutes. Adam kept looking between CJ and Nick. "So, you knocked him off the bed, huh? Nice. Simple, but nice. Nick grunted while taking a bite of his pizza. "But you two have slept together, haven't you?" Nick spit out his pizza and stared at Adam. "How?" CJ sighed and nodded. "Just keep quiet, Al. Do you know what the guys would do to him?" Adam grinned at Nick. "Can't hide anything from me. Speaking of... Nick you have a gorgeous perfect little ass!" Nick about choked. "Nick, I told you I sent it." "Yea! But I thought it was a damn decoy, and how the hell did he know?!" "Calm down Nick. You're drawing attention to us." Adam grinned. "And I'm sort of a sex radar. At least when it comes to Jassy here. I can always tell... not that it happens a lot, but I know when it does." CJ blushed and sat silently eating pizza. "You two are pretty close, huh?" CJ whispered something into Adam's ear and he nodded. "So did you two ever... you know? Since you did date and all." Adam reached into his pocket and pulled out his wallet out. He pulled out a $20 bill and gave it to CJ. "When you're right, you're right Jassy." "Thank you very much Al." Nick stared at them quizzically. "She bet that you would ask if we ever had sex, and that you'd ask in the next 5 minutes. She added probably within 2 but definitely in the next 5 minutes. Here it is, 2 minutes later and you have asked." Nick watched as CJ grinned and put the $20 in her pocket. "It's not just you, Nick. Everyone who finds out asks us. I've made somewhere around $1,000 over the last 10 years from this exact bet. You'd think he'd accept the fact that people want to know. At the very least he could stop accepting the bet." Adam smiled. "Is it really that much? So maybe I should start trying to get some of it back." "So maybe you should stop taking this bet and start making some of your own!" Adam laughed. "Ok smart ass maybe I.... Hey Jassy? Why is there a scratch mark on your neck?" Adam looked at Nick. "Don't look at me! CJ?" She sighed. "Damn it. I missed one." Adam and Nick both stared at her, worried. "It happened with the fans. I thought I'd at least covered them all up. I guess I missed one. "Them ALL?! What the hell CJ?!" Nick moved over next to her and stared at her scratch. "Man, we need to get this taken care of soon. You don't need it getting infected." Adam was staring at Nick. "What? She didn't tell you about the fan attack?" Adam shook his head. "No! She didn't! Spill it Jassy!" "It's nothing, really. I tried to divert attention from the guys at the hotel and went into a swarm of screaming fans. I didn't realize that some of them knew me and I ended up getting sorta attacked. I got pulled on, scratched, and I think I may have had a punch land on me. If Nick hadn't come out when he did I might have gotten really hurt." Adam looked at Nick, then back at CJ. "Well thanks Nick for saving Jassy. And you Jassy, needs to tell me these things!" She nodded. "CJ, how many more cuts are there?" She shrugged. "Didn't count them. Just covered them all up.... or so I thought. I didn't want Doctor brothers freaking. OH SHIT!" She pulled out her phone and texted AJ. He immediately texted back. "If you two guys will excuse me,I'm going to call AJ. Be back in a few." She walked outside to call AJ.

Adam looked at Nick and smiled. "You are VERY cute. But don't worry. I'm not going to try anything. I know you're straight. Besides, Jassy likes you too much." Nick instantly turned crimson red. "You like her too, don't you?" "I... what do... umm..." Adam laced his fingers on the table and laughed. "I can tell. It's ok. Lots of people do. Most just don't have access to her like you do. So please be careful with her." Nick rolled his eyes. "I've already been threatened by 3 other guys... probably 4, but at least 3." Adam shook his head. "I'm not threatening you. I wouldn't do that. I'm asking you to be careful with her. She's got this place in her heart that she has blocked off and caged it with barbed wire and armored guards to protect it. She doesn't open up to people very easily because of it. For some reason she's opening up to you. So tread carefully... and above all, be honest with her. If you lose interest, don't lie. Be up front. She may not like it, but she'll accept it and move on. But if she's lied to, well it's not easy afterwards. We'll put it this way Nick, you see how we are, right?" Nick nodded. "Ok, when she gets lied to about these things, she closes up to everyone, even me!" Nick's jaw dropped. "I understand. And hey, thanks for not threatening me." "No problem. But I will say this: If I find out that she got hurt because you lied or deceived her; I will hunt you down and make you sorry. That's not a threat. That's a promise! I'm normally an easy-going and let bygones be bygones type of guy. But hurting my Jassy like that will change me. So unless that happens, we're good!" Adam smiled and Nick shuddered. Adam scared him more than AJ, Brian, Howie, AND Kevin combined.

CJ walked back in and sat back down next to Adam. "Code Red diverted. Yellow still up though." Adam laughed. "Sounds about right for AJ." "So, what'd I miss?" "Not much Jassy. But I gotta get going. I'm going to be busy the rest of the day. So if you two are done I'll walk you out." Nick and CJ got up. "Ok, Al. We can go." Adam walked over and paid for lunch, and the three of them left. Adam stopped at the corner. "Ok sweetie, I gotta go. I'll miss you. Keep me updated, ok?" He picked her up and hugged and kissed her, then whispered in her ear. "You're kidding me, right?" Adam shook his head and held out his hand. CJ smiled. "You're on then." They shook hands, hugged again and Adam walked away. CJ walked back to Nick. "What was all that about CJ?" CJ smiled. "He's just trying to earn some of his money back, that's all. So, where to?"


	11. Chapter 11

After several hours of walking around New York City together, Nick and CJ went back to the hotel. "So Nick, do you wanna come up and keep me company? I have a massive mansion of a room all to myself." She giggled. "And I get bored easily. Plus, no pesky brothers to come knocking that easy." The front desk clerk handed CJ a note. She and Nick both read it. 'Hope you had fun. I also hope you ate dinner, because we already did. Rehearsal is tomorrow at 12 sharp. Sleep well. See you tomorrow. Love, Brian". CJ smiled. "See? This means he had no intentions of finding me!" The front desk clerk handed one to Nick. They both read it. 'Dear Nick, PAWS OFF!!! Rehearsal at noon. Be there or I'm coming to find you. Peace, AJ". Nick stared at her and flashed his mischievous smile. "Why not? Let's go!"

They went up to her room and turned on the TV. "It's only seven. If you're hungry I can order room service." CJ looked at him. "So how about it?" Nick pretended to think for a minute. "Yea. Sure. I'm starving." CJ called down and ordered food and something to drink. 20 minutes later they were eating while watching 'Looney 'Toons. "You know CJ, I love the fact you're a total kid inside. Cartoons instead of almost anything!" She smirked. "I love Bugs and Daffy. You can't do much better than Looney 'Toons... Unless it's Smurfs!" Nick laughed and they sat on the couch next to each other for what seemed like hours of silence.

Nick had been wanting to ask CJ something. It had been bugging him all day. "Hey CJ, You said..." He looked down. CJ had fallen asleep. "You said you think you got punched. Where at?" He took this opportunity to try and find a bruise or some scratches. He started looking all over what skin he could see. But he couldn't see anything. Then he remembered, "Wait, you said..." He looked down at CJ. She looked so sweet and peaceful. He lightly shook her. "What?" she asked groggily. "Can I see your cuts and scratches? It's been bugging me all day... and a bruise if you have one." CJ sat up a bit and took her shirt off. "Whoa! CJ... I wasn't trying to..." Then he saw the scratches that were all up and down her arms. He also saw what looked like a bruise forming above her shoulder blade on her back. "Oh CJ, I'm so sorry. CJ you need to take care of this." He looked at her and she had fallen asleep again. So he went and found a first aid kit. He put antibiotic ointment and Band-Aid's over all the cuts and scratches he could find. He also found an ice pack and put it on her bruise, then had CJ lean up against. "Why didn't you tell someone it was his bad?" He found a blanket and covered her up. Then he set an alarm clock for 10 am and put it by her head. "Good night CJ. Pleasant dreams." He kissed her forehead and went to his own room.

Nick laid in bed and thought about the whole day. He had loved spending time with CJ, just talking to her, laughing with her, being goofy with her, just being himself with her. That was so hard to do with most girls. Most girls expected him to be Super Star Nick Carter, not just plain ol' dorky Nick. He'd even met other girls who knew celebrities, and they still wanted Super Nick. She'd treated him like a normal guy from the moment she met him. It was nice. "I hope it doesn't change."

Nick thought about lunch with Adam. "A super guarded piece of her heart... But why?" He remembered overhearing Brian and Kevin talking sometimes about CJ and being in "that place" again. "I wonder if it has to do with this... Carrot person..." He felt a tug at his heart. "Damn. Why does that keep happening? I guess the best thing to do would be to ask CJ about it." He started letting his mind wander. Soon he was asleep, dreaming:

Nick was wandering around, playing on a Slip & Slide with some friends. He had to keep his mind busy today. It was a bad day, it always on this day.  
Nick flashed to 5 years later. He was dating a cute girl. She was his first girlfriend since joining the Backstreet Boys. She had brown hair. He loved brown hair. She had always reminded him of someone.  
Nick flashed forward another 10 years. Every girl seemed to be missing something. He hadn't had an actual girlfriend in so long. They all either lied, or worse they left him. It was too hard to deal with. Flings worked better. It didn't hurt when they left.  
Present Year - 1 week ago. "Seriously? You're bringing your fucking sister? Don't we have enough fucking women on this bus already?!" He looked over at Leighanne, Rochelle, and Leigh. "No offense ladies." Nick scowled at AJ and Brian. AJ looked at him and yelled back. "She's coming with us, damn it! We barely ever get to see her anymore. This is a perfect opportunity to spend time with her and catch up. So keep your fucking hands off! She's not one of your fuck and dump girls that you never have to see again! She'll be on tour with us for a year! So you'll just have to fucking deal with it!"  
The room went black and Nick is just wandering around. A light comes on over a girl. He runs towards her. Just as he gets close to her she runs away. 5 more girls appear. Nick runs towards them, and they run away too. CJ appears under a bright light. He runs to her, and she doesn't leave. But when he gets right in front of her, she's just a small girl. She fades into the darkness.


	12. Chapter 12

Nick sat up in bed in a cold sweat. "What the hell?" He looked at the clock. "10 am already? Why the fell is it so dark then?" He looked over and saw the curtains were closed. He stood up and went to the window and peaked through the curtains. "Rain." He looked at the date on his open laptop. "Why is today always such a bad day? It has been for as long as I can remember." He got a shower and got dressed. By the time he got done it was 11:30. "Time to head out, I guess." When he got off the elevator and walked into the lobby he saw CJ sitting there. 'Maybe it won't be so bad after all' he thought to himself. He smiled and started walking towards her. His smile faded as he got closer to her and noticed she was crying. "Hey, what's wrong CJ?" She looked up at him and wiped some tears away. "Uh, nothing. Bad dream... or something. Maybe it's the rain..." She looked everywhere but at him. "Are you ready? I'm not exactly sure where I'm supposed to go or how to get there." Nick nodded. "Yea. It's close enough to walk." He grabbed her hands and helped her up then lead her towards the door. He stopped then pulled her into a hug. "It' will be ok. Whatever it is that's wrong. It will all work out." He smiled at her and the walked out into the rain.

Rehearsals took almost 2 hours total. CJ got done and went to her dressing room to text Adam. "Talking to him will make me feel better. She had just sent her text to Adam when she heard a knock at the door. She opened it up and saw Adam standing there. She smiled and wrapped her arms around his neck. "Hey sweetie. I knew you'd have a bad day. So I took the day off. I have 2 days until my next show. So I'm all yours until tomorrow morning." She let go of his neck and looked up at him. "I thought you'd forget." He wiped some tears from her eyes. "Who? Me? You should know better than that. Is that why you've been crying for the last 3 hours?" She started to nod then looked up at him. "Wait, you saw me? Al?" "Yea. I was about to go in your hotel when I saw you and Nick walk out together. I was clear in the back during your rehearsals. I didn't want to distract you. You sounded great by the way, even through your tears." She leaned her head against his shoulder. "Thanks. You know sometimes I feel nuts for bawling my eyes out... especially in front of my brothers." He wrapped his arms around her and hugged her. "I know sweetie. So, what do you want to do today?" "Nick?" Adam laughed. "OK, I meant going shopping or something But I guess I could..." He turned his head and saw Nick standing in the doorway. He let go of CJ and turned to face Nick. "OH! Heh. Sorry CJ. A bit of a miscommunication. Hey Nick!"

Nick stood in the doorway scowling at Adam. He wasn't sure why, but he wanted to punch Adam right now.He had no explanation for this feeling. He clenched his fists and held them at his sides. "Nick?" He looked at CJ and loosened up a bit. "What's wrong Nick?" CJ walked over to him. "You look horrible! Here, come sit down." She walked him over to the chair at the end of the room and helped him sit down. He sat down, rigid as a post, shooting evil glances over at Adam. 'What the hell is wrong with me,' he thought. CJ brought him a bottle of water. "Thanks." Nick took a drink as he watched Adam walk up by CJ and put his arm around her shoulders. At that moment Nick slammed the water down, stood up, pulled CJ to him gazing into her eyes, then kissed her with a raw passion he'd never felt before. Adam stood there gawking at what was happening. When they broke the kiss, Nick stared down Adam and stormed out of the room. "What the hell was that?" Adam stared at CJ. "I have no idea," CJ said breathlessly.


	13. Chapter 13

Nick went running through the halls backstage. He had to get out. He had to get away. New York would be a good distraction. He walked down the street, trying to get CJ off his mind. "What is wrong with me?" He stopped outside a little restaurant. He had no idea where he was, but he did know that he was hungry. So he went in and ordered some lunch. He looked all around him, he saw the people gawking at him. Beautiful women were staring at him, and giving him THAT look. He knew that look. He could have almost any woman in this restaurant that he wanted. They all wanted Super Nick. While he was eating his lunch, he spotted a woman he would be willing to give Super Nick to. She was a gorgeous brunette. 'Of course she's a brunette,' he thought. 'They're almost always brunette. CJ's a brunette. STOP THAT Nick. Stop thinking of CJ!' Once he was finished eating lunch, he strutted over to the beautiful brunette that was sitting by herself in the corner table. "Hi." He gave her his sexiest smile. "Do you wanna go for a walk...or something...with me?" She nodded her head vigorously and stood up. Nick went over and paid for both of their lunches. He walked back and took her by the hand and led her out the door. Nick looked over at her. "Anyway, Hi. I'm..." "You're Nick Carter! Oh my God, I can't believe this." She stared at him. "Oh, I'm sorry. My name is Stacy." He nodded. "Nice to meet you Stacy. That's such a beautiful name. So, Stacy... do you have any plans for the rest of the day?" Stacy batted her eyes at him. "Well of course I do, silly. I have a Backstreet Boys concert later in the day. But until then, and ever after then I'm all yours. You... I mean We can do anything and EVERYTHING you want to do!" Nick smiled. That was exactly what he wanted to hear.

CJ was pacing backstage. It was almost time for her to go onstage and no one had seen or heard from Nick in hours. AJ came up behind her and put his hand on her shoulder. She jumped and turned to face him. "Oh...AJ... it's just you." He looked concerned. "Don't tell me that you're getting a case of stage fright. You've never been scared of performing in front of people." She shook her head. "No, nothing like that. I'm just worried about Nick." AJ nodded. "Yea. I understand. It's not like him to just disappear like this. He has before, but that was because..." AJ stopped. "What? J, tell me!" AJ shook his head. "It's nothing sis. Go on stage. Have a great time, and give this show the kick ass starter we need! And don't worry. I'm sure he'll turn up soon." He gave her a hug and a warm smile. CJ went on stage and sang as if her voice would bring Nick back sooner.

AJ watched CJ from backstage. "Of all the days for him to run off and make her worry..." He looked behind him and saw Nick trying to sneak in. "Yo, Nick! What the hell man?" Nick slowly turned to face him. "Hey....AJ.... Umm, sorry for the late appearance. I was...ummm. I was just... umm... busy." "What's her name?" Nick tried his best to look shocked. "I haven't done...." Nick sighed. "Stacy. Her name is Stacy. We've been running around New York all day. She's in the audience tonight. AJ shook his head and stated to walk away. "Get ready. We're on soon." CJ looked over and saw Nick following AJ. 'He's safe,' she thought. She finished her last 2 songs and ran backstage to go find Nick and talk to him

CJ ran around all over backstage trying to find Nick. "I just need to ask him about earlier." She was still looking for him when she heard the band start to play. "DAMN IT!" She walked down to her dressing room, grabbed her things and then left the building to go to her room. She texted Adam to meet her there. She didn't want to be alone. 15 minutes later, Adam was at her door. "Did you get to talk to him?" She shook her head and wrapped her arms around him. "It's alright sweetie. Tell you what... we'll order room service, watch some TV, and talk for awhile. You can talk to Nick when he gets back. OK?" CJ nodded. It was better than her plan to sit here and cry. Adam came back over and sat next to her. "Food is ordered. Hope you're hungry!" CJ looked over at him with tears welling up in her eyes. "What's wrong sweetie?" "Al, am I crazy? Is there something wrong with me?" Adam shook his head. "No Jassy. Nothing's wrong with you. Why are you asking?" She started crying. "Because... I.... I haven't even known Nick for a week and I'm..." Adam pulled her close and stroked her head. "Sweetie, you can't help who or when you fall. You've just fallen in love sooner than most people do." She shook her head. "I'm not in love with Nick!" Adam laughed at her. "The hell you aren't! Look at yourself, Jassy. You are crying because he's been missing and all you want to do is talk to him, but you can't. Hell, from what you texted me, it sounds like you stormed out because you thought he was ignoring you! He wouldn't even know you stormed out!" He laughed. "Like I said Jassy, you can't choose who you fall for. Because if you could, you would be mine Jassy. I would be head over heels for you." She smiled and giggled at him. "What?! I'm not kidding Jassy. I'm as in love with you as I can be without wanting to have sex with you. 'Cause that part just doesn't do it for me. But I would if I could choose who I loved like that. But that's why you're my best friend and why I could never live without you. You know now that I think about it, we almost have a typical hetero marriage... Love without the sex!" CJ laughed so hard she snorted. "There's that smile. Now here's what we do... I mean you do about Nick. You go talk to him tomorrow morning." She looked at him confused. "So your emotions don't go overboard. Anyway, you go talk to him about this morning. Then you'll work in how you feel about him. Then you tell him to leave your brothers to you, that you'll talk to them about dating him without a major beat down. What do you think?" She nodded. "Sounds good to me. But you never answered me. Am I crazy?" Adam chuckled. "Definitely! But you should never change!" Soon after they ate dinner, she was asleep with her head in Adam's lap.

After the show was done, Nick went and found Stacy. They walked to the hotel hand-in-hand. He took her to his room and gave her the grand tour. "This is the living room, sorta. This is the kitchen. In here is he bathroom with a lovely Jacuzzi. And over here is the bedroom." He smiled at her. "I was thinking of taking a nice long bath and then some..." he looked her up and down, "sleep. You interested?" Stacy nodded and followed him into the Jacuzzi. Nick reached over and pulled her face to his and started kissing her. Soon he was tangled with her. She was all over him. He was rubbing on her. "I think we're clean enough," he said as he took her hand and helped her out of the Jacuzzi and led her to his bedroom. 'Well, here comes Super Nick,' he thought as he closed the doors to the bedroom.


	14. Chapter 14

CJ woke up and saw Adam cleaning. "Hey sleepyhead!" Adam smiled at her. "I thought you could use all the sleep you could get. So I thought I'd clean up the mess and pick up some of your stuff so you don't have to worry about it. I have to leave in a few hours. So what I'm thinking is some breakfast first, then I play a little dress up and you can go see Nick after I leave. What do ya say?" CJ nodded and go up to help Adam clean. After breakfast, Adam helped CJ pick out clothes, do her hair and make-up, and help her look her "yummiest" for her talk with Nick. When she was all done, she rode down to the lobby with Adam to say goodbye to him. She walked outside with him and gave him a big hug. "Please be careful Al. I love you." "I will Jassy. I love you too. Let me know what happens, ok? This is too juicy, and I'm too invested now NOT to find out how it ends!" CJ laughed and kissed his cheek. "I will. I'll see you soon Al." She watched as he got into a cab and drive off. She stared down the street for a few minutes, then let out a big sigh. "Well, here goes nothing!"

CJ was busy daydreaming in her head as she headed up to Nick's room. She could feel the butterflies fluttering in her stomach quicker with each step she took closer to Nick's door. Once she was outside his room, she fixed her clothes and let out a long sigh. She gently knocked on the door. "Nick, are you in there?" She knocked again. Howie came out of his room and handed her a room key. "Here. He needs to get ready to go anyway." She took the key and let herself in. "His room seemed messier than the last time. She walked around the room looking for Nick, but couldn't find him. She walked over to the bedroom doors and knocked. "Nick? Are you awake?" She put her ear to the door to listen. When she heard a soft snoring, she smiled and opened the door to wake Nick up. "Wake Up Nick! I have something I need to tell you!"

Nick opened his eyes and saw CJ standing by his bed looking down at him. He smiled up at her. "Hey there CJ. Good Morning!" As he rubbed the sleep out of his eyes, he realized that CJ wasn't looking at him, she was looking past him. Then he remembered Stacy. He turned and saw her looking at CJ. "So, ummm, yea. Nick needs to be getting ready to go. We're supposed to leave soon. So...yeah." He saw the tears forming in CJ's eyes as she turned and walked out of his room. "Wait! Don't go Little Prin...." He stopped in the middle of calling after her. "Oh... My...God!!!" Nick's jaw dropped. Stacy sat up and kissed his shoulder. "Good morning. So," she curled her lip up, "Who was THAT?" Nick turned to face her. "She's... She's just the opening act. Listen Stacy I'm leaving town," He looked at the clock, "in about an hour." She nodded. "I know you're leaving. But I thought that maybe we could..." "NO!!!" Stacy winced. "Sorry. I just have a lot to do and not a lot of time to do it in. That would just distract me and I wouldn't be able to get packed. They'd leave all my shit here too!" He kissed her cheek and threw on some clothes. "I'm sorry." With that he ran after CJ.

CJ threw the rest of her clothes in her suitcase and placed it by the door. "He has every right to..." She wiped the tears away. "I'm not gonna cry." She concentrated on packing. "I can't let my brothers see me like this." She sniffled and wiped one more set of tears away. She heard the elevator coming up. She made herself busy and made sure to not look at the door. "Don't worry Howie. I'm almost finished!" "CJ, I...I have no excuses." CJ turned to see Nick, not Howie. "You WERE crying! I... I... CJ I figured out that..." "Nick, please leave. I need to finish." "So do I, But CJ I..." "Get. Out. PLEASE!" Her voice turned to ice. "OK. I... I understand." AJ walked up to CJ. "Hey sis. Ready to go?" She nodded. "I just need to make a quick check around the mansion to make sure I didn't forget anything." AJ chuckled. "OK. Nick, you god to go?" AJ arched his eyebrow. "Yea, man. Everything is taken care of." AJ nodded. "Then I'll see you two downstairs." CJ walked around her room again an stopped in front of Nick. "So... let's just go downstairs." Nick watched CJ walk to the elevator. "Oh, little princess," Nick whispered. "How could I have forgotten you? And now... Now you hate me." "Are you coming?" CJ stood on the elevator holding the door open. "Yea. Yea, I'm coming." He walked over and onto the elevator. "Let's go."


	15. Chapter 15

CJ walked onto the bus and straight to her room. "I HATE men!" She yelled as she threw herself onto her bed. "They always... He doesn't even know how I feel. We weren't dating. He had no obligations to me." She started crying again. "He can sleep with who or whatever he wants." She buried her head in her pillow and continued crying. Brian walked in and sat down next to her. He placed his hand on her back and started lightly scratching. "What's wrong J? How can Big Bro Brian help?" She turned her head and looked up at him. "I just... I can't... Brian I..." She sniffled and sighed. "I'm just having a hard time... adjusting to everything and everyone. I feel like I have no one to talk to about... girl things. Texting Al is just too hard when I have a lot to talk about. And you know I love you and all my brothers... But sometimes I need to talk to a girl... or Al." Brian nodded. "OK J. How about I see if I can arrange for you, Leighanne, Leigh, Rochelle... and Kristen to have dinner tonight once we get to Pittsburgh?" "Kristin? We're meeting Kevy in Pittsburgh?" He nodded again and smiled. "That would be great! Oh thank you Brian!" She sat up and threw her arms around Brian and hugged him tight. Brian returned the hug and rubbed her back. "Alright CJ. I'll go talk to the girls and call Kevin and see what I can do." He wiped the tears from her eyes and left her to herself. "I'm sorry B. I can't tell you the whole truth. But maybe the girls can help." She smiled and put on her iPod to 'Through With You' by Maroon 5. She closed her eyes and leaned back on her bed and just relaxed.

Nick was playing on the Playstation 3 with AJ and Howie when Brian came into the room shaking his head. "She's lying. I know she is... but I don't think completely. Howie looked up at him. "What did she say was wrong?" Brian sighed. "That she's just having trouble adjusting and needs some girls to talk to. So do you two think you can convince Rochelle and Leigh to have a girl's night with J tonight? Leighanne should be on board. She's been wanting to spend time with J anyway. And since we're meeting Kevin and Kristin in Pittsburgh, I'm going to call and see if Kristin wants to go too." AJ nodded. "yea, man. Rochelle has been asking when she can spend time with J again. Shouldn't be a problem." "Yea, Leigh too. She wants to see CJ really bad. It's been awhile since they've gotten to spend time together." Brian grinned. "GREAT!!! Hopefully this will help her out, and we can hope that she opens up to the girls. Nick, are you sure she didn't say ANYTHING to you about why she's upset?" Nick jumped. "Uh... no. Not a thing." Brian, AJ, and Howie all looked at each other. "OK then. I'll go call Kev and talk to him." Brian left and Howie went to find Leigh. AJ sat next to Nick. "You know Nick... we love CJ. She's our little sister. But we love you too. You're the little brother that was never born into the family. So if you need something, we're here. You know that right?" Nick nodded. "Yea, even though you guys threaten me on a daily basis I know." Nick chuckled. "I'm ok though." AJ punched Nick's shoulder. "You're lying too! So how about you and I go out on the town tonight too. Just you and me. Brian, Howie, and Kevin can stay here with the kids. Whatcha say?" Nick really didn't want to go out. That's what screwed him this morning. But it might be good to get out. "Nick?" Nick looked up at AJ. "Sure. Just not the same place as he girls. Maybe we can go play pool or something?" AJ agreed. "Cool. I'll let the guys know." AJ went out of the room. Nick turned his attention back to his game."No distractions tonight," he told himself.

CJ had been listening to her iPod for several hours when Rochelle came in and jumped on her bed. "HEY GIRL!! Night out on the town... Just us girls!" Leigh and Leighanne came into the room. "No men," Leighanne sang. "And no kids!" Leigh smiled. Rochelle leaned in close and whispered, "But lots of talking about 'em!" CJ laughed. "Yeah. Thanks ladies. I need this." Leighanne smiled. "well, technically you're our sister too..." "Almost sister! But love you like one anyway!" Rochelle butted in. "Yeah. That too." Leighanne continued. "So if you ever need us we're here. Just shoe the boys away and we can talk. Oh, by the way... Kristin is confirmed for tonight too!" CJ smiled. "So where are we going to go then?" They all looked between themselves. Leigh spoke first. "Well we definitely should get dinner. We can do that first." Leighanne nodded. "Then maybe we can go dancing!" "With a few drinks in there too," Rochelle finished and winked at CJ. "I think CJ could use a few drinks. She's been working hard!" The girls all laughed. "Sounds good to me. Thanks ladies. I love you girls!" They all hugged. "So," Leighanne started, "go ahead and start getting ready. Brian said it would only be about and hour and a half until we got there... And that was a half hour ago! So we'll go get ourselves ready too. Remember... You need to wear cute, girly clothes." CJ nodded. "Mmmkay. See y'all in a bit!"


	16. Chapter 16

The bus pulled up outside a nice hotel. When the doors opened up, Kevin, Kristin, and Mason all walked on. CJ ran up to them and hugged Kristin and the Kevin. Kevin squeezed CJ and picked her up off her feet. "Oh, it's good to see you J Bird." He kissed her cheek and then put her down. CJ walked over to Mason. "Hi there Mason! Look at you. You're getting SO BIG!" She picked him up and twirled him around. Mason giggled. She kissed Mason's cheek then sat him down. "So Mason, if you wanna go see Baylee he's right in there." Mason took off running. CJ smiled. So Kevy, Brian and Howie are in there with the kids. They're waiting for you. AJ took Nick out tonight. He's having a bad day too." Kevin nodded. "Thanks J Bird." Kevin kissed Kristin and CJ. "You two have fun tonight ok?" They both nodded. He started to go join Brian and Howie, then he stopped and turned. "Oh, J Bird. Remember what I said though. SQUISH! OK?" CJ laughed. "OK Kevy." CJ turned to face Kristin. "So, we are meeting the others at the restaurant. So, are you ready to go?" "Hell yeah!" CJ laughed. "OK then. Bye boys! We're leaving!" CJ and Kristin started towards the restaurant. "I figured we could walk. It's just a few blocks away. The other girls left a bit early because they had a few things to take care of before they could go. So they said for us to go ahead and go." Kristin nodded. "What's wrong J? You're not quite yourself. I understand needing to talk to some girls... but that's not all, is it?" CJ sighed. "I'll explain it to you. But I'm thinking it'd be easier to explain and answer questions once. So let's just wait until we're all together. OK?" "Sure thing J." They got to the restaurant, went in and got seated. After about 10 minutes Leighanne, Rochelle and Leigh showed up.

After 20 minutes of random chatting and ordering dinner, everyone looked at CJ. "OK girl," Rochelle said, "spill it! Who's the guy and what'd he do?! Want us to kick his ass for you?" CJ stared at them. Leighanne spoke up, "You might be able to fool your brothers..." Leigh laughed. "They're not THAT clueless. They just don't know what we do." They all laughed. "So, like Rochelle said... SPILL IT!" Kristin eyed CJ. CJ looked around at all of them, and leaned in closer to them. "None of this is to get back to my brothers. NONE of it! Agreed?" The four ladies all nodded. "OK, so here's the quick explanation:" CJ took a deep breath and started talking very quickly, "I fell for Nick! I was going to tell him this morning. I walked in and he was in bed with..." "OK. Got it!" Rochelle frowned. "Another one night bimbo for Nick." Leighanne shook her head. "Poor guy. I really kinda feel bad for him. He just doesn't like being left. So what's he do? He has meaningless flings that HE can leave and not have to worry about getting attached to." Kristin looked at CJ and smiled. "Exactly how long HAVE you known Nick?" CJ blushed. "Five or six.... days." "They've been together almost every second of every day since she got on the bus though. I've seen them talking...and flirting. He seemed to be into her too.... REALLY into her." Leigh added. "Yea. Your brothers have been eyeing the two of you. They're suspicious. That's the reason they upped the threats towards Nick. AJ told me he was going to try and get Nick to spill tonight too." Rochelle smiled at CJ. "Girl, he is a great guy. He just has a fear of women leaving him. None of us have ever figured out why though." CJ nodded and hung her head. Leighanne put her hand on CJ's shoulder. "CJ, I think I know what happened. He was getting so attached to you so quickly. So instead of sticking around and trying to work out his issues, he got spooked and ran off and had himself a fling so you wouldn't leave him.... He was leaving you... so to speak." "I think I understand." Kristin interrupted. "Nick was getting attached, which doesn't happen a lot. So he took control of the situation. He went out and found bimbo girl and slept with her. You might have left him, but he made it happen. To Nick, it's inevitable that every woman is going to leave. He doesn't want to be hurt. So although it hurts a bit to make you leave, the attachment was just going to grow. So it's easier to have you gone sooner rather than later. Well, at least he didn't sleep and then try and leave you." CJ blushed. Rochelle's jaw dropped. "OH MY GOD, CJ! You slept with him!!!" Rochelle yelled. CJ turned and stared at her. "You wanna say that a bit louder, Ro? I don't think the people in the kitchen heard you!" The girls all turned to stare at CJ. Rochelle ignored her and continued. "Well no wonder he's spooked! He has a HUGE attachment to a girl that he not only slept with, but he can't leave her behind neither!" They all nodded. "Can you girls please quiet down a bit? Now do you see why I said nothing leaves the circle? Don't say anything... PLEASE?!" CJ laid her head in her hands and started crying. Leigh got up from her chair and walked around to CJ and hugged her. "Sweetie, none of us is going to say anything to our guys. Now listen to me." CJ looked up and Leigh continued. "Don't fight what you are feeling for Nick... any of it. You can't help who you love or when you fall." CJ giggled. "You know, that is the exact argument Al used to convince me to tell Nick in the first place!" Leigh laughed. "I've always said that Adam is a smart man. But this is important ok? Don't fight the love or the anger. But do NOT act out towards him. Stay friends....for everyone's sanity on a tiny bus. Plus, the guys won't get more suspicious of the two of you. But move on sweetie. Find a nice guy here and there. If Nick is going to stop running, he'll eventually come around. If he doesn't... well you are still moving past it. OK?" CJ nodded. "Ok then. How about we take you out for some fun. Let's go dancing. Maybe we can find you a nice guy there!" They all agreed. They paid for dinner and went in search of a night club.

Nick was getting his ass whooped at pool, but it was nice to be out. "So Nick, how about we make a wager on the next game?" Nick shook his head. "HELL NO! You've kicked my ass every game! I'd be broke in 5 games." AJ laughed. "So we won't wager money then. How about the loser has to answer a question from the winner?" Nick knew this bet very well. AJ used it on him when he was younger to get him to open up more. Only back then it was betting over video games. "Alright AJ. You got it." AJ went easy on Nick, but he still won. "Alright AJ, a deal's a deal. Whataya wanna know?" AJ smiled. "Well, I asked you before what your intentions with J were." Nick nodded. "But now I'm curious about something else." Nick looked at him quizzically. "I want to know... Why are you running?" Nick stuttered, "Wha... Wha.. What... Huh?" "Nick, you hadn't looked at a single woman since CJ got on the bus. Did you even realize that?" Nick shook his head. "Yea, well normally we have to start ignoring your 'oh look at all the hot women' comments. But you haven't said a damn word about any female since you saw CJ. But then, out of nowhere, last night you bring a girl with you... to the hotel! Now normally this isn't unusual for you. But when you haven't even looked or mentioned another girl... this is odd. So, I'll ask you again: Why are you running? And what are you running from?" "Pick one! One game. One question. Them's the rules buddy!" AJ chuckled. "Fine. What are you running from?" Nick let out a deep sigh. "Myself. I didn't even realize it until this morning when CJ woke me up. She looked... amazing... just so beautiful. I didn't even remember what I'd done until CJ saw Stacy lying in bed with me and ran off after telling me to wake up." AJ's jaw dropped. "What? Did I say something stupid?" AJ just stared. "Yo! AJ! Dude, what's wrong?" AJ shook his head. "CJ saw you with Stacy this morning?" Nick nodded. "Yea. Why?" AJ took out his phone and immediately started texting. Nick realized what he had said. "Should I start preparing for a beat down now?" AJ shook his head. "But you told us she didn't say anything to you!" "Well, she didn't! I didn't lie. She hasn't really said much to me except to get up and get moving... Oh, and she told me to get out of her room too." AJ scowled. "Technically. But MAN! Nick you KNEW what was wrong this ENTIRE time... Damn and it's why you've been so fucking weird all day!" Nick just nodded. "Alright here's the deal, we aren't going to say anything to the other guys." Nick looked confused. "Then who the hell did you just text?!" "Oh, Monkey. I wanted to see if she knew all this. Cuz is she doesn't it might be easier to..." AJ looked at his phone and read the new text, 'Butt out! We've got it covered. Girl time. See you later. Kisses'. "That answers that. They know. OK so we won't..." "CJ TOLD THEM?!" "Cool it Nick. I'm not 100% sure. But my guess is they know. They probably have every tiny detail. But getting back to you and avoiding a massive ass-kicking." Nick looked around. He felt dizzy. He sat on the edge of the pool table. "What have I done? She's going to hate me forever. She'll never know..." Nick, I don't think she hates you. "Nick looked up. "If she did, she'd have flown back home, or to Adam or something. She wouldn't be out with her sisters-in-law. She might not like you very much right now, but she doesn't hate you. But we need to keep this quiet. I think B and Howie know about Stacy. But just avoid the subject. Don't completely avoid J, but kinda keep out of her way. OK?" Nick went blank. "Nick?" Nick slowly nodded. "OK then. You wanna play another game? You wanna go back?" Nick looked around at all the people who were staring at them. "AJ? Why are you being so nice about all of this instead of kicking my ass right now?" AJ laughed. "Because I realized when you stopped looking at the other girls that you weren't just interested in a one night deal with CJ. I also realized how much she opened up to you. She hasn't done that since..." AJ trailed off. Nick looked up and brightened a bit. "Since? AJ, since what?" AJ stared off into space. "Nothing. Forget I said anything. Let's get outta here, ok?" Nick nodded disappointedly. "Yea... OK."


	17. Chapter 17

AJ and Nick got back to the bus and joined Brian, Howie, and Kevin with the kids. Kevin looked up. "Hello you two. Have a nice time?"

 

They nodded. 

 

"Good. So how about you two stay kinda quiet. We need to get the kids calmed down and ready for bed. It's going to be hard enough without their mothers to tuck them in.," Kevin said. 

 

Nick looked at Kevin. "They're not back yet? But it's after 11." 

 

Brian nodded. "We know. The kids are only up because we thought they'd be back by now. But we just got a call from the ladies. They said good night to the kids and told us they'd be back eventually. But they were enjoying their girl time." 

 

AJ laughed. "I'll bet. They don't get a whole lot of downtime for themselves. I'm glad they're enjoying themselves." 

 

Nick nodded. "Ok. Well, I'm off to bed. Goodnight everyone." 

 

They all yelled goodnight as Nick walked to his room. "She's still out," he said to himself. Nick laid down on his bed and closed his eyes. 

 

Nick woke up to giggling. He looked at the clock. "3 a.m.? They're just getting in?" 

 

He got up and went to where he'd last seen the guys. "No one's here? Then what was I hearing?" 

 

He heard the giggling again. He followed the sound to CJ's room. "They must be talking for awhile longer before they go to sleep. I should say goodnight to them." 

 

He knocked and opened the door. "Goodnight lad...ies." 

 

He looked and saw CJ with another man. She was smiling and laughing. She looked up, saw Nick, and stopped. 

 

"Oh, hey Nick," she said. 

 

"Oi! I'm no lady," the man said with a thick British accent. 

 

Nick stared at the scene before him. "Uh, sorry man. I heard CJ giggling and thought the girls were still in here with her.." 

 

CJ shook her head, stood up, and walked over to Nick. "Nah, they've been in bed for a couple of hours. Oh, where are my manners? I'm so sorry. Nick, this is Joeleo. Joeleo this is Nick Carter, the Backstreet Boys you had yet to meet. 

 

Joeleo nodded at Nick. "'Ello. Nice to meet you." 

 

Nick stared between CJ and Joeleo. "Yea. You too. Hey, I'm gonna go back to bed. Night CJ, Joeleo." 

 

Nick gave CJ a quick hug then turned and walked out the door. Nick walked back to his room muttering, "She's with another man." 

 

CJ watched Nick walk away before closing the door and turning back to Joeleo. He was such a gorgeous man. He had sharp features. He had sapphire blue eye and a full head of chocolate brown hair. He reminded her of James Marsden in the late 90's. He looked a bit like Al too. She smiled at him. He was easy to watch. Then you add in the accent... CJ had always had a weakness for British accents. 

 

"So what shall we do for a couple of hours? We're going to be leaving here by 8 am, and I need to at least LOOK like I slept," CJ said, walking back over to the bed. 

 

Joeleo laughed. "I can think of a couple things." 

 

He leaned up and kissed her. She let out a soft moan. She put her hand on his cheek and pulled him in closer. He pulled her back onto the bed, kissing her deeper, moving his hand down her thigh. 

 

'Do I let him do this? Someone give me a sign,' CJ thought to herself. 'I'll probably never see him again. So unless I hear something, I'm going to let him.' 

 

Joeleo pulled her skirt up and slid his hand further up. He pulled her on top of him with the other arm. 

 

She started kissing his cheeks, his ears, his chin. Quick little pecks all over his face. 

 

Joeleo's hand was now touching CJ's core. She moaned in pleasure. He started teasing her, moving his fingers in and out, rubbing the outside, then back in. CJ pushed her hand between them and unbuttoned his jeans. She put her hand down his pants and grabbed at the bulge. Joeleo thrust up, freeing his member from the confines of his pants. CJ rubbed herself on him. He bucked up, causing her legs to straddle him. 

 

*'For Your Entertainment' plays* 

 

CJ jumped. "Oh shit, it's Al!" She got up off Joeleo and grabbed her phone.   
'There's my sign, as usual,' she thought before answering her phone. 

 

"Hey Al. No, everything is fine. Why?" She looked at the clock. It was 4:30.   
"I'm sorry sweetie. I've been out with the sisters-in-law all night." She gave Joeleo an apologetic look. 

 

"Al, I'm fine. I know I said I'd call but I've been busy. I'll call you very soon. Ok Sweetie. Love you too. Bye." 

 

CJ hung up the phone and smiled. She grabbed a pen from the desk and wrote her number on Joeleo's hand, with one digit wrong. "I'm so sorry. I need to get some sleep. Call me, ok?" 

 

Joeleo grunted and rolled his eyes. "Yea. Whatevs. Let me guess, Al's the boyfriend. Right? You're meeting him in the next city or something?" 

 

CJ giggled. 

 

"Well, I'm just guessing from the 'love you'... And the ringtone." 

 

CJ nodded. "I love Al very much. I miss him. I'm so lonely without him. I'm not used to not being around him." 

 

Joeleo grunted again. "I guess I have to respect that, don't I?" He rubbed his hands together, then showed them to CJ. The number had disappeared.   
"If we ever run into each other again, and we're both free, how about we give it another go?" Joeleo asked. 

 

CJ nodded. "You're very sweet. Thank you." 

 

Joeleo nodded, fixed his pants and stood up. CJ walked him to the bus door.   
"It truly was a pleasure Miss Carter. You have to be the most gorgeous girl I've ever met. He's a lucky man, I hope he knows that." 

 

CJ blushed. "Thank you Joeleo. I really hope we meet again sometime."   
Nick watched CJ and Joeleo through a small opening in his bedroom door. He watched them kiss goodbye, then went back into his room and laid down. 

 

"She slept with him. I can't believe it. I've lost her." He closed his eyes and sighed. "I can;t believe I've lost her again. And it's all my fault this time." 

 

CJ stopped at Nick's door and knocked. "Hey you. I came in to say goodnight." 

 

Nick nodded at her. "Yea. Night." 

 

CJ walked in and sat down next to Nick on the bed. "What's wrong? Talk to me, Nick." 

 

Nick grunted and rolled over, his back to her. "Joeleo seems nice." 

 

"He is. Too bad I have to leave him here," she said. 

 

Nick turned his head toward her. "What? Why?" 

 

CJ giggled. "Oh, because I told him I missed my boyfriend." 

 

Nick frowned. "I didn't know you had a boyfriend." 

 

CJ smirked. "I don't. He assumed Al was my boyfriend. He was so sweet about the whole thing, I didn't have the heart to tell him Al was gay. But I did tell him the truth; that I love Al very much, and I'm feeling very lonely without him. When I told him that he got up and left, and not all upset either. He just said he hoped we met again someday, when we were both unattached." 

 

Nick turned his whole body towards her. "Stopped? You mean you two didn't...." 

 

CJ shook her head. "Nah, I asked for a sign to tell me whether I should or shouldn't. Al called. I took that as my sign. That happens a lot actually." 

 

Nick looked at her, confused. "Adam stops you from having sex? But wait, you said you didn't sleep with people you've just met. You said it 'wasn't you'." 

 

"Exactly. Every time I've ever met someone I thought I might bend the rules for, I ask for a sign telling me not to." 

 

Nick just stared at her. "And?" 

 

"And usually Al texts me or calls me. He really is a walking sex radar. But it let's me know I shouldn't go through with it. Once when I was asking for a sign, he actually showed up at my house when my phone wasn't working." CJ smiled at the memories. "It's kinda funny actually. Though, most of the guys aren't as civil about it as Joeleo. But Al usually just plays the part of my jealous boyfriend, but that won't work now...You know, now that I think about it, you're the first person I've never gotten a sign about." 

 

"So basically you're saying you didn't do it, right?" Nick asked hopefully. 

 

CJ laughed. "No Nick. I didn't sleep with Joeleo." 

 

Nick sat up. "I'm glad." 

 

Nick watched her, his eyes showing the hunger he still had for her. He wanted all of her: mind, body, and soul. He knew that now. 

 

Nick noticed CJ staring at him. "What? Do I have something on my face? Is there something in between my teeth?" 

 

CJ shook her head. "I just don't get you, that's all. You get jealous of Joeleo, and the thought of me having a boyfriend. Yet when we started to get close, you ran off and slept with... Stacy? Was that her name?" 

 

Nick sighed. "Yea, Stacy. You scared the shit outta me." 

 

CJ stared at Nick. "A commitment-phobe. I guess it's a good thing I found you in bed with Stacy. 'Cause if I had told you... If I had said what I wanted to tell you... At least we can be friends this way. I want to stay friends, Nick. I can't imagine my life now without being able to pick on you." She laughed. 

 

"CJ, what were you going to tell me? Please, I need to know," Nick said, looking right into her eyes. She felt, in that moment, that Nick could see her deepest, darkest secrets. 

 

'I can't tell him,' she thought. 'He'll run away again. I'll ruin what we have.' That's what her brain told her. But she just couldn't keep her secret. 

 

"I was coming to tell you that I love you. That I wanted to..." 

 

Nick leaned in and kissed her. CJ melted into him. 

 

'STOP IT,' her brain screamed until she broke the kiss.

 

"Sorry Nick. I can't do it, not after what happened. Let's... Let's just be friends. That's all I can handle right now." 

 

"But CJ..." 

 

CJ shook her head as she stood up. "No Nick. For the sanity of everyone on this bus, let's just be friends." 

 

Nick sighed. "Ok CJ. If that's what it takes to keep you in my life," he said reluctantly. 

 

He stood up and hugged her. "Good night CJ. Get some sleep." 

 

CJ wrapped her arms around Nick's neck and kissed his cheek. "Good night," she whispered as she pulled away. It was so hard not to give into him. Especially when all she wanted to do was push him down on the bed, kiss him stupid, and then fall asleep beside him. But she wasn't going to put herself in the position to get hurt again. She waved at him and walked back to her room. 

 

She plopped down on he bed and took a few deep breaths. "I should probably call Al, at least text him." 

 

She grabbed her phone and took a few more deep breaths before dialing his number. "He is NOT going to be happy with Nick."


	18. Chapter 18

Nick woke up to yelling... "What the..." 

 

He looked out the door and saw Brian, Howie, AJ, Kevin, and all the girls standing there, staring in the direction of CJ's room. He looked at the clock; 10:30 am. "Hey Brian. What's..." 

 

"Shh." Brian put his finger to his lips. "J's fighting with Adam. It's never happened before... NEVER!" 

 

Nick stood up and put his ear to the wall, but all he could hear was muffled yelling. 

 

AJ made his way into Nick's room and sat on his bed. "I've heard the whole thing. I could even hear Adam yelling over the phone." 

 

Nick sat down next to AJ and looked at him intently. "What's going on? What could they possibly be fighting about?" 

 

AJ stared at him. "You, ya doufus! She's trying to calm him down. He's threatening to come kick your ass, even if he has to cancel concerts." 

 

Nick thought back to his conversation with Adam; "I will hunt you down and make you sorry. That's not a threat, it's a promise." Nick shuddered. 

 

AJ continued explaining: "He's pissed as hell Nick! Luckily, CJ seems to be talking some sense into him, but that's where the yelling comes in. She's only yelled at him a few times. See, he gets to a point where he loses touch with what's around him, what's going on. His common sense just disappears. When he comes back around, he's pissed. He's usually in attack mode. So CJ is yelling and fighting with him so he won't come..." 

 

"Make me pay." Nick interjected. "Yea, I get it. Maybe I should..." 

 

"NO!" Everyone within earshot of Nick and AJ's conversation yelled. 

 

"Bad idea," AJ said harshly. "No... The worst idea you've ever had." If CJ's able to get him calmed down, you're not going to help. You will send him back immediately. It won't be pretty, 'cause we won't be able to stop him." 

 

Nick nodded. "Fine. I'm going to go for a walk around the bus." 

 

AJ nodded, and everyone cleared a path for Nick. 

 

CJ sat on her bed listening to Adam yell on the other side of the phone. 

 

"Jassy, you don't need this! You deserve better! How can you tell me everything's fine? He's a player and always will be. I thought when I saw him that maybe... But I was wrong! I'm coming there and I'm going to kick his sorry little ass! I don't care how perfect it is!" 

 

CJ fought back giggles. Adam said some of the funniest things while he yelled. "Listen Al, you need to calm down." 

 

"Don't tell e to fucking calm down Jassy! He..." 

 

"AL! CALM YOUR FUCKING ASS DOWN! WHAT THE HELL WILL YOU TELL THE VENUE/ NOT TO MENTION THE FANS! FUCK Al, just think for a minute." 

 

Adam growled at her. "I'll think of something alright." 

 

CJ was getting pissed off now. She knew there was only one way to get Adam to listen now. It was her last resort, and she hated to do it. But she was desperate now. 

 

"Jassy, I've decided. I'm going to leave and..."

 

CJ inhaled deep. "ADAM MITCHEL LAMBERT, SHUT YOUR FUCKING MOUTH AND LISTEN TO ME!" 

 

Ch heard dead air on the other side of the phone, and a collective gasp from the hallway. She glared at all of them. They all turned and walked away. 

 

"I'm sorry Jassy... Fuck, you just called me Adam!" 

 

"Yea, I did. It's the only way to get your attention. You need to calm down. No good is going to come from you flying here to beat Nick's ass." 

 

"But Jassy..." 

 

CJ growled. "NO ADAM! I WON'T HAVE IT! First of all, Nick and I weren't and aren't a couple. Second, you have a commitment to your fans." 

 

Adam's voice quieted down to a normal level of worry. "Jassy, you don't need this. I told him... He promised to be honest Jassy. That's why I'm pissed off." 

 

CJ smiled. "I know Al. And you can go ahead and be pissed off. Just don't leave a concert to come kick his ass... In fact, don't kick his ass at all. I need you to forgive him. I did" 

 

Adam sighed loudly in the phone. "Jassy, I can't just..." 

 

"Please Alley-Kat? This is important to me," CJ said in a little more than a whisper.

 

"First you full name me, then you call me Alley-Kat. How can I deny you this if you're gonna go so far to sway me? Alright Jassy. I'll stay, and hold off the ass-kicking. I'll forgive him. But only once Jassy. You tell him that. This is a one time deal. He won't get any leniency next time. The smallest indiscretion against you and I'll be there." 

 

CJ smiled. "Thanks Alley-Kat. But I don't think you'll have to worry about a next time." 

 

"What do you mean Jassy?" 

 

CJ rolled her eyes. "Didn't you hear the part where I said we weren't and aren't a couple?" 

 

"Yes Jassy, I did. But you lo..." 

 

"I know that Al." CJ cut Adam off. She didn't want to hear it. She didn't even want to think about it. "I also told him we need to stay friends... At least for the sanity of the people on the bus." 

 

Adam got quiet again. 

 

"Al? You there?" 

 

"Yea Jassy, I'm still here. Sorry, I was just thinking. Rational me is saying you're making a HUGE mistake. But irrational, pissy me says good riddance." 

 

CJ laughed. "Thanks Al. I love you too. Listen, I gotta go. I have things I have to do. I'll keep you updated on everything." 

 

"Ok Jassy. Talk to you later. Bye Sweetie. And I mean it, you tell him no second chances!" 

 

"Bye Alley-Kat," she chuckled out." 

 

They hung up, and she got a text immediately after. "I forgot to tell you I love you too my Jassy Bear. Your Alley-Kat." 

 

"Ok, now to go talk to everyone else." CJ took a deep breath.then got up and walked to the front of the bus.


	19. Chapter 19

Nick was sitting on the couch in the middle of everyone, but was oblivious to what was going on around him. He was lost in his own thoughts. 'She's fighting with Adam about me. She should just let him kick my ass. I deserve it. If she only knew. If he only knew. How could I have screwed up so badly?" 

 

Nick looked up and realized CJ had entered the room. "Everything's fine guys. Al is once again his docile, free loving, hippie type self." 

 

Howie looked at her. "Yea J, but only after some major yelling on your part. You've never fought with him before. What the hell was going on?"

 

"So we get two firsts on our visit: Our first time seeing J-Bird sing on stage, and her first fight with Adam. I feel so privileged," Kevin said.

 

CJ shot Kevin an evil look. "Howie, Kev, all of you: Can we just drop it. I don't like yelling at Al, and I'd like it even less if y'all insist on discussing it."

 

Leighanne walked over and wrapped an arm around CJ's shoulders. "It's ok sweetie, if the guys want to continue discussing this, us girls can escape into the next room and leave the kids with them, ok?"

 

CJ nodded as tears started filling her eyes.

 

Nick felt a pang in his gut. He wanted to be the one to console her. 'Should I? Screw thinking about it. Just do what you think is right,' Nick thought to himself.

 

Nick nodded to himself then stood up, walked over to CJ and wrapped his arms around her. "It's alright CJ. I'll take Adam's punishment if it'll make things easier for you."

 

CJ shook her head. "No, it's ok. Al's better now, although I'm sure if I called him he could be on the next flight out.," CJ said with a giggle. "Listen, um, can I talk to you about this in private?"

 

Nick smiled and nodded. "Sure thing." He pulled her closer, kissed her forehead, and laid his cheek on the top of her head.

 

It was only when CJ snuggled into his chest, that Nick remembered they were still standing in front of everyone else. Nick opened his eyes and turned his head, everyone was staring at them. The girls all had giant grins on their faces.

 

Nick coughed nervously. "So, let's um... Let's go in there and talk, ok CJ?"

 

CJ looked up at Nick, then past him to everyone else, then back at Nick. "Yea," she said, grabbing his hand and leading him to her room.

 

CJ plopped down on her bed and patted the area next to her.

 

Nick walked over and sat next to her.

 

CJ was still fighting back tears. She hated fighting with Adam. She pushed all that to the back of her brain and focused on what was going on. She took a few deep breaths to steady her voice, then looked up at Nick, into his eyes so he knew she was serious. "Al told me to talk to you. It took quite a bit of convincing, but he forgives you. But he said forgiveness is a one time thing. He won't forgive you again. Now, I say he will 'cause he will listen to me."

 

CJ saw Nick's eyes light up. "That doesn't mean I've changed my mind, Nick. I'm just saying I know how to calm him down when he gets mad at people who hurt me."

 

"But Brian said you two had never had a fight before," Nick said.

 

CJ nodded. "Yea, I know what they think, but that's just not true. Al and I fight, it's just never been in front of them or in public. Just think about it this way: 11 years ago Al and I were in high school leading a half-way normal teenage life, except during the summer. But 11 years ago, y'all were doing the Millennium tour. My brothers have been gone a lot over the last decade from touring and promo stuff, as you know. So that's a lot of time that Al and I had to fight without any of them knowing."

 

Nick smiled. "Well, if you're going to be all logical about it... I guess I should have thought about that."

 

"Yea. Al and I don't fight a lot, but it does happen. No one gets along perfectly. Even the happiest couples in the world fight occasionally, right?"

 

Nick thought back to the few times he'd seen Brian and Leighanne fight. But when the were done, they always came out of it stronger than they were before.

 

"The only problem is that when we do fight, it gets really ugly. We're both stubborn and bullheaded. Adam blames it on the count of us both being Aquarians. Actually, today was quite tame compared to some of our blow ups," CJ said.

 

Nick's jaw dropped. "That was TAME?"

 

Tears started welling up in CJ's eyes again. She hated thinking about it. She nodded and sniffled. She allowed Nick to wipe away the tears that had escaped and pull her close. She leaned on him, laying her ear over his heart, allowing the gentle beating to sooth her. She wrapped her arms before looking up at him. His eyes were locked on hers. He leaned in, holding her gaze. She felt her willpower slipping away. She was losing it to those beautiful blue eyes. She leaned into his hand as it grazed her cheek. She allowed him to pull her face to his, to put his lips to hers. His lips were soft and sweet and needy. 

 

He pulled her in closer, intensifying the kiss. He parted her lips with his. His tongue entered her mouth and met hers, dancing together. She put her hand on his face. They were becoming one, acting instinctively, perfectly in sync with each other, and she needed more contact with him. They let their arms explore each other, but never breaking the kiss. CJ let out soft moans, Nick felt incredible, just like she remembered.

 

"CJ?"

 

Nick and CJ both jumped at the sound of AJ's voice. 

 

"Oh. Sorry. I um... I was going to see if everything was ok... CLEARLY it is. I'll see you um... Out.... Bye!" AJ half-smiled and walked back out the door.

 

CJ looked at Nick then pushed herself away. "I'm sorry. That shouldn't have happened."

 

"Yes, it should have," Nick said emphatically.

 

CJ stood up and started towards the door. Nick grabbed her wrist. "CJ, don't go. Please? We need to talk. Please CJ," Nick pleaded.

 

CJ shook her head and walked out the door without another word. Nick didn't know what he should do. He wanted to chase after her, to tell her everything. But he knew, even if he did she wouldn't want to talk, maybe not even want to be around him. Since the bus was moving, he knew there wasn't a lot of room to get away from anyone. So instead of chasing after her, he went to his room and laid down on his bed. His mind was racing. "She still feels the same, but she won't be with me. Is she scared? Maybe if I tell her everything... I dunno, all I know right now is that she and I NEED to talk. Fuck it, I'm going back to sleep. There's no point in doing anything about it right now." He closed his eyes and tried to go to sleep.


	20. Chapter 20

  
CJ was sitting up by the driver, trying  very hard not to cry. She felt a hand on her shoulder and turned to see who it belonged to. She saw Kevin. She smiled weakly at him.

  
"Don't even try that J-Bird. It's not going to work on me. I know something is wrong. Talk to me."

  
CJ sat there and thought about the options. On the one hand, if she told Kevin, he could get mad at Nick. Then that could be as bad, or worse than if Adam had flown out to them. On the other hand, if she didn't tell him, he might think it was just him, that she and the rest of them were keeping secrets form him. She didn't want that either. 

  
She stood up and flung her arms around Kevin, crying into his shoulder. "Oh Kevy. I'll tell you, but you can't tell the others. OK" Promise me this stays between us."

  
"Sure thing J-Bird. You know you can trust me. You want to go somewhere more private to talk?"

  
CJ nodded. "We can go to my room. It's the most private place I know, as long as I lock the door."

  
Once they were locked in her room, she took a deep breath and began telling Kevin everything about the last week, only omitting the part of sleeping with Nick. Kevin listened without saying anything. Just nodding to let her know he was still paying attention.

  
"Anyway, yesterday I told him we should just stay friends. But I was just kissing him, and I wanted to keep kissing him. It felt so great, but I can't do it. I can't put myself out there just to have another Stacy. When I saw them, I felt like I was losing someone again. I can't... I just can't do it." CJ started crying into her hands. 

  
Kevin sat down next to her and hugged her tight, like a good big brother should. "I get it now. Now I get why you had to yell at Adam. Adam's very protective of you, possibly more than we are. Oh J-Bird, I'm so sorry. If it helps any, I can tell he likes you a lot. He's not pulling his normal 'oh she's so hot' routine around you. But I completely understand your feelings of distrust."

  
CJ cried harder into Kevin's shoulder. He sat there, rubbing her back until she was calm enough to talk to him again. "Why am I so invested in him Kevy? It makes no sense. I'm usually so careful not to get too attached. But with Nick it just happened. I didn't even realize it until I couldn't stop it."

  
Kevin gently stroked her hair. "I don't know what to say about how it happened. But maybe, just maybe it happened because it's time to start letting go of Carrot. You know, start moving on with your life. Try dating a guy and not wondering if he's Carrot. Maybe not Nick, maybe someone else. Or Maybe you could try again with Nick."

  
CJ shook her head. "Not Nick, not now. But maybe you're right. Though, it'll be hard to do while on the road with you... Well, the other guys."

  
"I know J-Bird. I'm not saying you jump on the dating ship. But rather, stay open to the idea of it. How about that?"

  
CJ nodded again, then pulled away from Kevin. "Ok Kevy."

  
Kevin kissed her forehead and wiped away her tears. "Ok, well the family and I will be headed home after the concert tonight. We should be arriving at the venue in a couple hours. So why don't you go spend some time with Kristin and Mason while you can. You know, get your mind off things."

  
CJ nodded and hugged Kevin again before heading out the door.

  
"Oh, CJ?"

  
CJ stopped and looked at Kevin.

  
"It'll be our little secret, I promise."

  
CJ grinned at her eldest bother. "Thanks Kevy." She went out the doorway and went to find Kristin and Mason.

  
AJ walked in and sat next to Kevin. Kevin smiled at AJ. "You know something about all this, don't you Alex?"

  
AJ nodded.

  
"I need this figured out before I leave. So spill!"

  
AJ smirked. "I have Nick's side of the events, and I think I know why J's so weird about the whole thing."

  
Kevin sat up taller, making himself intimidating. "Tell me now Alex!"

  
"Ok Kev, chill," AJ said before telling him everything from the night of pool game.

  
Nick sat up in his bed. He couldn't sleep. So he got out his laptop and started surfing YouTube. He found some of CJ's video and watched them. "Wow, look at her go. No wonder she's been getting attention." He found a video of CJ singing 'New York State of Mind' by Billy Joel. "She looks so young," he said. He looked at the video description. "She was singing like that at 10 years old?"

  
"Pretty good huh?"

  
Nick jumped and turned around to find Kevin leaning against the door. "Oh, hey Kev. You know, for all the stuff you've told me about CJ, I sure don't know a lot about her. I never knew she could sing like that at 10."

  
Kevin shrugged and nodded. "Yea, well we don't like talking about her a whole lot. Since she wasn't in the spotlight, we wanted her to have a normal life. Quite honestly, we all thought she'd be a lot more known by now. We offered to help her out a couple times, but she turned us down. She told us if she was going to make it she didn't want to use our fame to boost her career, she wanted to do it on her own. We thought that was great and backed off. About 6 months ago she started posting those videos up, and now look at her!"

  
Nick smiled and nodded.

  
"Listen Nick, since you're up I was wondering if I could talk to you for a bit."

  
"Kevin man, I'm sorry I upset CJ. I'll keep my hands off her, I promise," Nick said nervously.

  
Kevin laughed. "It sounds like you've had quite a bit of practice saying that. But that's not what I want to talk about."

  
"Really," Nick asked very surprised. "Then what about?"

  
"You," Kevin said. "You're acting more upset than CJ is. I mean yea, she's been crying, but you hide away from everyone when you get really upset. And here you are, hiding in your room playing on your laptop, avoiding the world. So what's going on in that head of yours?"

  
Nick lowered his eyes. He didn't know CJ'd been crying.. "Not a lot."

  
Kevin lightly smacked Nick on the back of his head. "Boy, don't try to pull that shit with me. I know you better than that, you know I do. I'll whoop it outta ya if I have to."

  
"Yea well.... It's habit by now. Sorry." Nick half smirked. "I guess.... It's just.... Man, your sister has my head all up in knots. I fucked up bug time. I couldn't cope, then I got stupid. Now she doesn't..." Nick sighed.

  
"So basically you're telling me you actually have feelings for my sister. And instead of acknowledging them and doing what you should, you turned chicken and ran away. Now you're regretting it."

  
Nick nodded. "Pretty much. Now she's in my head, she's stuck there. I can't concentrate on anything else. But she just wants to be friends."

  
Kevin nodded, listening. "Is there anything else Nicky?"

  
"Not really."

  
"Is there anything I can do to help," Kevin asked.

  
"Do you know how to get a woman out of your brain," Nick asked.

  
"Sorry. That's one thing I never learned how to do. But then again, I ended up marrying the one woman who never left my mind so..." Kevin smiled.

  
Nick sighed. "Then no, not really." He went back to watching videos of CJ.

  
"We'll be at the venue in about an hour. Make sure you're ready," Kevin said before leaving Nick's room.

  
Nick found a video titled 'CJ Sings The Backstreet Boys'. Nick clicked on it and listened to her sing "Don't Wanna Lose You Know", and started singing along, harmonizing with her.

  
"That's it, I'm not gonna push her anymore. I'll give her what she wants and earn her trust back. Then maybe she'll see..."


	21. Chapter 21

CJ was still playing with Mason when the bus finally stopped and shut off.

"We must be here," Kristen said. "I'm so excited to hear you tonight, see how you perform on a large stage. Mason is too."

Mason threw his arms around CJ's neck. "Auntie J-Bird sing for Mason tonight?"

CJ laughed and picked him up. "Yup, just for you little man."

Mason squealed in delight and clapped his hands. "Yay! Love you Auntie J-Bird."

CJ kissed her nephew's cheek and nuzzled him. "I love you too, Buddy."

CJ put Mason back on the ground and rustled his hair. Kristen smiled as she watched the two of them. "He misses having you around, you know that right?"

CJ nodded. "I've missed him too. It's been a really hectic couple of months. I never expected to be here, not on tour or anything."

Kristen smiled. "We did. We all knew knew you'd make it someday. But Mason was so used to having you around. He's your biggest fan."

CJ smiled. "I know. And it really means a lot to have y'all here." CJ squatted down and kissed Mason's cheek again. "Especially my little Mason."

Mason squealed again and ran off to the back of the bus. CJ stood up and started after him.

"No, that's ok. I've got him. You should probably go get your stuff together anyway."

CJ nodded and hugged Kristen close. "Ok. I guess I'll see you guys in a little while."

Kristen nodded then headed off to get Mason.

CJ walked to her room and put a few things in her "to go" bag and walked to the front of the bus. She saw AJ and Kevin talking quietly. They both looked at her and smiled.

"Hey J-Bird!"

"Don't pull that with me Kevy. I know you two were talking about me. Can everyone please stop worrying about me, please?"

AJ and Kevin looked at each other then back at CJ.

"No," AJ said. "But we can promise to not talk about you when you are in the room with us. That way you won't hear us worrying."

CJ laughed. "You are so strange, AJ. But I guess that works."

Kevin smiled. "Don't you know that worrying is in the 'Big Brother Handbook'?"

"You know Kevy, one of these days I need to see a copy of this handbook for myself.."

Kevin patted himself down. "Well J-Bird, I don't have one on me. So it won't be today."

The three of them laughed.

"What's so funny?" Brian walked into the room.

CJ shook her head. "Nothin' B. So is everyone ready to go now?"

Brian nodded. "All we have to do is get in there. So shall we?"

CJ nodded and followed AJ and Kevin off the bus.

After the system check and rehearsals, Nick went back to his dressing room and sprawled out on the couch. His mind kept wandering back to CJ, even though he kept trying to think of other things. "DAMN IT!" He grabbed his laptop and started searching around on YouTube. Before he knew what he was doing, he'd found more videos of CJ and started watching them. He found one titled "CJ Carter sings Mandy Moore's 'Let Me Be The One'." As he listened to the words he smiled. "She was singing to Carrot." He watched that video a few more times then shut his laptop. "I really need to stop thinking about her." He looked at the time. "I still have a couple hours." He grabbed his wallet and headed towards the exit.

"Hey, where are you going?" Nick turned around and saw AJ.

"I was just gonna go for a walk. I'll be back before the soundcheck."

AJ frowned at him. "Going to pick up a girl?"

Nick looked shocked. "Nah, I just need to get my head together. I'm so distracted right now. I can't keep my head straight."

AJ nodded. "Alright. But if you aren't back in 2 hours we're sending out a search party."

"Gotcha. See ya AJ."

AJ nodded as Nick headed out the door.

"I'm starving. Where can I go grab some food?"


	22. Chapter 22

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> In case it isn't obvious, the text that is centered is a dream sequence.

CJ laid in her room on the couch. She was so exhausted. She wasn't used to an actual tour schedule... not to mention all the work behind it. "I have a few hours before I need to be on stage. I should try to get some rest." She grabbed her iPod and put in the earbuds to listen to her 'Sleepy Backstreet' playlist to try to relax and fall asleep. She closed her eyes and started humming along to 'More Than that', 'No One Else Comes Close', 'Darlin' ', 'Unmistakable', 'Missing You', 'Siberia', and 'This Is Us'. Once 'Drowning' started playing, CJ drifted off to sleep.

 

CJ was a little girl again, happily playing while surrounded by her brothers and Adam. She looked down the street and saw a little blonde boy come running towards them. CJ smiled her biggest smile. Who was he? She'd never seen him before.

"Hey Kid," Kevin yelled at the boy.

He stopped and started at all of them. "Hi," he said.

"Where you headed?"

The blonde boy smiled at them. "We just moved in down there. I'm going to tryta catch my dad. Momma forgot to put carrots on the list and I just ate the last one."

The boys all laughed at him.

"Hey, can I come play when I get done? Momma says I should make friends."

They all nodded.

"OK. Be back soon."

The boy ran off down the street.

"Look J, another kid around your age!" Howie picked her up, gave her a kiss on the cheek and swung her around. She squealed in delight. She looked at Adam who was pouting.

"Down How, pwease.?"

"OK Little J." Howie placed her gently on the ground. 

She ran over to Adam and hugged him. "Adam, we's gon have a cawwot to pway wif!"

Her brothers laughed. Brian patted her head. "No, J. He's a boy. But he likes carrots... I think. He'll be our... your new friend."

"Cawwot's a boy?"

"His name isn't Carrot. He has a name."

"What is? What is?"

The boys looked at each other and shrugged. Brian looked down at her and smiled. "I dunno J. But it's not Carrot."

CJ pouted and watched the boy go running back toward his house.

"Was a cawwot!"

Brian shook his head. "No, J. His name is not Carrot."

"it is! Its is! It is!"

The boy came running up to the group and stopped in front of them, panting. "Momma says I can play for awhile."

CJ pushed her way through her brothers and up to the blonde boy smiling her sweetest smile at him.

"Well hi! I didn't see you before. You look like a pretty little princess in that dress."

CJ grinned at him then looked back at Kevin. "II's a pwincess?"

Kevin started to say something but the boy turned her around before he got any words out. "To me you are. Andya always will be."

CJ squealed and hugged him. "And you's a cawwot, wight?"

The boy giggled at her. "If you want me to be. I'm a carrot."

She squealed again and turned to her brothers with a triumphant attitude. She put her hands on her hips and yelled "SEE?! I tolds yous hims a cawwot!"

The boys all laughed. "Alright J, you win. Hims a cawwot."

Kevin smacked AJ lightly on the back of the head.

"Ow!"

"You've been told to speak properly to her." "Sorry Kev. It was just so hard to resist. She just talks so cute!" He smiled at J, who was grabbing Carrot's hand and pulling him toward Adam.

"Cawwot, this is my best fwiend, Adam. Yous twos fwiends now too."

She smiled at Carrot and Adam. They both nodded.

"K." She dragged Carrot over to her brothers. "Dese my brovvers. Dats Kevy and How and Bwee...Bwy...Hims a Bee and dats Alex and James... And I's a pwetty wittle pwincess."

Carrot smiled down at her. "I'll remember."

CJ beamed up at him. "K. Now we pway!"

 

CJ Flash Forward

 

CJ watched date after date, guy after guy, face after face flash in front of her. She always had a reason to dump them. They always had one thing wrong, one thing that told her they weren't Carrot. She had tried for a long time, with a few different guys, to put everything into the relationship. But every time she was hurt so badly. She watched herself put less and less effort in as she realized they weren't Carrot. She knew she'd stopped trying at some point. The flash of faces and dates started to slow down as her times with Nick started to play out in front of her. She smiled as she watched. She felt the warm fuzzies inside. She felt... something. That's why it was a big deal. She'd stopped feeling for guys. She watched as more of her and Nick played, stopping right before she opened the door that led to nick and Stacy. Her gut wrenched and knotted up. "NO! Don't open that door! it'll kill you inside." The CJ in the hotel turned toward her. CJ stared at herself.

"Why? What's behind the door?"

CJ cried. "You don't want to find out. I wish I hadn't/ Things might be different if I hadn't gone through that door." She put her head in her hand and cried.

The CJ in the hotel stepped out and sat by CJ. "Hi. I don't think we've met properly. I'm JC."

CJ looked up at her. "JC? But you're me!"

JC shook her head. "Not quite. I'm the you who still lives in the past and won't move forward. I'm here to help." JC smiled at CJ. "You see, I know all about your past. I know all the guys. I know all about Carrot, even things you've forgotten. I'm also here to help you move on from Carrot. We've lived too long holding onto Carrot. Think of all the great guys who we've turned down or thrown away a good shot at because of carrot: Mark, Jason, Travis, Eric, and most recently, Nick."

CJ huffed at JC. "He's the one who ran off to another girl and slept with her! See? That's what's behind the door.

JC nodded. Yea, I know. But what was the first thought that you had as you ran down the hallway?

CJ stared at JC. "I... I...I..."

"Come on CJ, admit it. What did you think?"

Tears welled up in CJ's eyes. "I thought 'Carrot wouldn't have done that to me... and then tried to rationalize for Nick." JC nodded. "Exactly. Yet you told me not to open those doors that would show me Nick with Stacy. If you're only searching for Carrot, and Nick isn't Carrot, then why would you care what is behind those doors? Why would you even care what I see?"

CJ started crying. JC handed her a tissue. "You know the answer to this. This is exactly what I mean. You throw away the possibility of something great because," JC made air quotes, " He's not Carrot!"

CJ continued to cry.

"So CJ, answer this: Why would you care what I saw?" CJ looked at JC. "Because it's killing me that I can't trust him." JC nodded. "What else?"

CJ looked at JC as realization came to her. "Because I never thought of Carrot while I was with Nick, not until I saw him with Stacy. And 99% of me wants to say 'fuck it all' and try being with Nick... Carrot or not."

JC smiled. "But it's that 1% that's holding you back, right?"

CJ nodded.

"Well CJ, I have good news for you."

CJ cocked an eyebrow at JC. "Oh yeah?"

JC nodded. "Yup. I am that 1% that you've been listening to. I'm the 1% that's been holding you back, and CJ as that 1% I 'm giving you my full permission to move on, move past the shit. I'm the 1% that's idolized Carrot and kept you from seeing the good non-Carrot qualities in guys, the part of you that shut down because they WEREN'T Carrot and you couldn't deal with the pain. Now I'm telling you that you're ready to move on. And I want you to know this: Whatever happens between you and Nick from here on, you owe him a great deal. He brought you to me so you could move on and move past Carrot. Nick made us feel again."

CJ smiled. "You're right. All thanks to Nick. I'll have to find a way to thank him.So... I guess this means I have to let you walk in on him and Stacy, huh?"

JC nodded. "Yea." She got up and walked back into the picture of the hotel. "Don't worry though, once you wake up you'll feel better and things will start coming back to you. It was great to finally meet you CJ. But I can honestly say that I hope we never have to meet again."

CJ laughed. "Me too... Wait! What things? And what do you mean wake up?"

JC smiled then turned to the doors and opened them.


	23. Chapter 23

CJ slowly opened her eyes and stretched out. As her sleepy fog started to lift she realized what song was on her iPod. "I don't care who you are, where you're from, what you did as long as you love me." CJ smiled. "Thanks JC."

"Last time I checked I wasn't in NSYNC."

CJ turned her head and saw Kevin standing in her doorway with a tray that had some water and a sandwich. CJ blushed. "Sorry Kev. I didn't see you there. I wasn't talking to you. I was talking to... myself?"

Kevin stared at her for a minute then shrugged and brought her over the tray. "Well anyway, I thought you might like something to eat. When you never showed at lunch I figured you'd fallen asleep, and could use the sleep. I was coming to wake you up and give you this and to tell you that you have 30 minutes until you're due on stage."

CJ took the sandwich and took a bite. She smiled and covered her mouth. "Thanks Kev. This is perfect."

Kevin smiled back. "Anytime J-Bird. So have you given any thought to what I said earlier, about moving on past Carrot?"

CJ swallowed her bite of sandwich. “Actually I have. It’s an interesting story. But short version… You’re right. I need to move on and stop comparing everyone to Carrot. I need to go out and date. Maybe not Nick, but who knows? But one thing’s for sure, I owe him a lot for sleeping with Stacy.”

Kevin frowned and shook his head. “J-Bird, I thought you’d gotten past that. Don’t you think revenge now is just kinda… I don’t know, evil?””

CJ laughed. “Not like that Kevin. No, I actually owe him a debt of gratitude. Maybe I can take him to lunch or buy him a watch or something.”

Kevin’s eyes popped out and he put his hand on her forehead. “Did you bump your head? Are you sick? Or did you just go completely insane in the last couple of hours while you were asleep?”

CJ shook her head. “Nah, I’m fine… and sane. I just thought about it. Nick sleeping with Stacy made me realize I was using a 7 year old to compare other guys to. But most importantly, he made me realize that I’d just shut down and had stopped feeling towards people. Nick made me… feel. Even though it hurts like hell, I can feel something again.”

Kevin sat down next to her and wrapped her in a tight bear hug. “Oh J-Bird, you’re finally back!” He held her in his arms and kissed the top of her head. When he let her go, CJ saw tears in the corner of his eyes. She smiled at him. “Aww, Kevy.” Kevin cleared his throat. “Maybe I should get him something too.” But what do you get someone who brought a sister back by sleeping with another girl? I’m pretty sure Hallmark doesn’t have a card for that.” They both laughed.

CJ looked at the door after she heard a knock. “Hey guys, what’s so funny?” AJ smiled and looked at the two of them.

Kevin shook his head as he stood up. “Nothing AJ.” Kevin leaned down and kissed CJ’s head again. “I’ll see you from the crowd, J-Bird. But to do that I gotta get out there. Love you. Break a leg.”

CJ nodded and continued eating her sandwich. “So what’s up J? You come to drag my ass to the stage?”

AJ shook his head. “No. I was just bored. Brian and D are talking about kids. Nick is just getting back. SO I came in here to wake your ass up and tell you to amuse me or something. I’m bored!”

“Nick’s back? He left?”

“Shit. Yea, he left and got some lunch. But he’s back safe and sound… sans girl.”

CJ smiled. “I’m not worried about it. He should go on some dates.”  
  
AJ stared at her. “Did you bump your head? Are you sick? Did aliens take over your body?”  
  
CJ laughed. “I’m fine. No aliens, just me.”

AJ cocked an eyebrow and stared at her.

“Talk to Kevin if you have questions…. Wait, drag D and Brian too. I ain’t having this convo two times, let alone four.”

AJ smiled. “Well, it’s definitely my baby sister in there.”

CJ rolled her eyes. “Gee. Love you too, J. Anyway, I need to get ready. So I’ll see you in a bit.”

AJ nodded and started to leave. “Oh J, Adam texted me. He said to have you call him. Apparently your phone is off.”

CJ grabbed her phone. “Damn, battery’s dead. Thanks J. Will you let him know I’ll talk to him after the show?”

AJ nodded and walked out, closing the door behind him.

“Now, what do I wear tonight?”


	24. Chapter 24

During soundcheck, Nick kept watching Kevin in the audience. He was beaming as he watched CJ sing and interact with the small group of VIPs. Sometimes he’d make faces at her, trying to make her laugh. Nick watched as the VIPs tried not to stare at Kevin, Kristin, and Mason. When they would stop trying, CJ would do something outrageous to get their attention back on the stage. If he hadn’t known she was the baby of the family before, her actions on stage would have given her away. She was an expert at getting attention. She was a tomboy too. The last time the VIPs started staring at Kevin, she made the loudest farting noise she could into the microphone. Everyone turned and stared at her. She just giggled and said “Sorry, I had tacos for lunch.” The VIPs stared at her as well as her brothers tried to contain their laughter. Nick was the only one who didn’t try to stop his laughter. But everyone just rolled their eyes and  ignored him.

As the soundcheck party started wrapping up, Nick realized that CJ had been staring at him almost the entire time. CJ got the last question of the day, and he knew that he wasn’t the only one who had noticed her staring at him.

“So CJ, do you have a crush on Nick or something? You’ve been staring at him.” The girls in the VIP group giggled and gasped. All of CJ’s brothers stared at her, even Kevin.

CJ blushed a bit then cleared her throat before she responded. “Well who wouldn’t? I mean look at him. He’s gorgeous. I’ve seen several of you staring at him too. I’m only human. But I mean, I’m a lucky girl to be on stage with four of the best looking guys in the entire world. Don’t you all agree?”

The girls all hooted and hollered and clapped in agreement.

‘Handled like a pro,’ Nick thought as he smiled and blushed. He watched CJ get up and started over towards each of them. She hugged and kissed each of her brothers on the cheek. When she got to him she smiled and did the same. She waved at the VIPs and leaned into his ear. “Can we talk after the show?”

Nick looked at her, smiled, and nodded. “ ’Kay. I gotta go get ready for the show. See you later.”

Nick nodded and watched her leave the stage.

“Ooh, I think Nick’s crushing too.”

All the girls giggled as Nick turned to face his accuser, AJ, who had a huge grin on his face. “I don’t see you denying it.” AJ smiled bigger.

Nick felt his face burning. “Yea, ok. I have a schoolboy crush.”

The whole group “aww”-ed at his statement. He smiled and looked at the side of the stage again, hoping to see CJ, but he couldn’t see her. ‘She must be movin’ quick today. I wonder what’s up with her. She seems different.’ Nick was lost in his own thoughts. ‘Concentrate. Wait ‘til after the show.’ Nick smiled at himself then turned his attention back to the VIPs.

Once CJ got back to her room she took her phone off the charger and texted Al. ‘I had an epiphany. Tell you about it l8r. I’m doing great. So don’t worry about me. I’ll call when the show’s done. Love & hugs & smooches. Your Jassy.’

“There. That should make him feel better. Now, what do I wear tonight?”

CJ rustled through her clothes for a bit until her phone rang.

“Hello? Oh hey Al. No, I promise you I’m great. I just don’t have time to tell you about it right now. Yea I promise after the show. But hey, since you’re on the phone I need help with my wardrobe. I have a sexy mid-thigh club dress or I have the leather pants with midriff top that goes with. What do you think? For the show? Ok, I’ll send pics. Thanks sweetie. Ok. In a few. Kisses.”

CJ smiled and shook her head. “I should have expected that. But it comes to my rescue.” She took pictures of the two outfits and sent them to Al and waited for his answer. When he did respond, it wasn’t quite what she expected. “If you’re gonna try to impress Nick, get thigh high boots and wear red club dress. Otherwise go comfy with leather. Good luck. Your Al.”

CJ dialed Al. “Hey, what makes you think my epiphany was about Nick? Or even if it was, that it was to try again? I know I’ve been crushin’ for years. Just ‘cause you know me like that doesn’t mean… Ok it was partly about Nick… BUT IT DOESN’T MEAN… It doesn’t mean I want to impress him like that. Fine Al. I’ll wear the club dress with my boots. Yes, I’ll send pics. Love you too. Bye.”

CJ put the leather outfit away. “Boy, my brothers are going to have a hay day with this.” She started listening to her iPod as she got ready. She started the process off by putting on ‘stage make-up’, slightly brighter and a bit more than day-to-day make-up, but not Broadway style. She hummed along to her music and finished up. After make-up was done and dress was on just right, it was time for the boots. She loved her thigh high, 4-inch heeled boots. But sometimes they weren’t worth the hassle. They had to be put on just right and held a certain way to get the zipper up. But DAMN did they look good.

As CJ reached down to get the 2nd zipper, she saw legs in her doorway. She zipped the boot up and turned to see Nick staring with his mouth open.

“Can I help you?”

Nick just stared.

“Hello? Nick?” She walked over and waved her hand in front of his face. He finally turned his head towards her. “There you are.” She took the headphones out of her ears. “What’s up? Did you need something?”

Nick nodded.

“What is it?”

Nick shook his head a bit. “Umm, 15 minute warning.”

“Thanks. Hey, while you’re here can you do something for me?”

Nick’s eyes popped wide open and he nodded.

CJ giggled. “Thanks. Can you take a couple pics of me with my phone? Al wanted to see what it looks like on me. What do ya think? Does it look alright?”

Nick took CJ’s phone and nodded at her. He took five pics of her then showed them to her. “Oh, these are perfect. Thanks Nick!” She kissed his cheek. As she started to send the pics to Al, Nick took the phone from her hands and threw it on the chair behind him. He pulled CJ close, wrapped her in his arms, and kissed her. He kissed her deep. It left her breathless. Before she could think, she wrapped her arms around his neck and pulled him closer. They stood there, their tongues dancing, as if nothing else was in the world but the two of them.

They only broke apart when they heard a knock at her door. CJ, still holding onto Nick, turned towards the hallway and saw Leighanne staring at the two of them grinning from ear-to-ear. She cleared her throat and started: “I was instructed to come down and get you, CJ. You’re needed on stage. Oh, and Nick, Brian and AJ are looking for you. Howie would be too but he’s got James at the moment. So… yea. Um, CJ if you’re going to get on stage you need to release Nick and come with me.”

CJ let go of Nick’s neck and backed up a few steps staring at Nick and smiling. She turned to leave then remembered her phone. She ran and got it then left with Leighanne.

“Girl, you look HOT in that outfit, but boy are your brothers going to throw a fit.”

CJ ran quickly to the side of the stage. She sent the pics to Al and then handed her phone to Leighanne. “Watch it for me?”

Leighanne nodded.

“Thanks.” CJ hugged Leighanne, grabbed her mic and then walked out onto the stage to the sound of screaming fans.


	25. Chapter 25

Nick watched Kevin beaming from the front row as CJ sang the last song of her set. Mason was dancing and clapping the entire time. Mason really loved CJ and her singing. The audience erupted into applause and cheering when CJ finished. She smiled and took her bow. Then she hopped off front of the stage and ran to Kevin and Kristin, hugging them both. Then she picked up Mason and gave him Eskimo kisses. After she put him down, Kevin helped her back up on stage and she waved to everyone. Another round of cheers started. Nick shook his head and smiled. ‘This is going to be an interesting night, in more ways than one,’ he thought.

“Oh boy,” Nick turned and saw Howie, Brian, and AJ standing behind him. Howie was shaking his head.

“What, Howie?” Nick stared.

“Oh nothing except now we get to talk about how CJ happens to know Kevin, Kristin, and Mason.”

Brian nodded. “people don’t really accept the whole ‘she knows all of us’ excuse especially when Kevin isn’t with the group anymore.”

AJ rolled his eyes. “Yea. Add in she picked Mason up and was rubbing noses with him, That’s not an ‘I’m just so excited to see the other Backstreet Boy’ thing to do either. Damn it! She should know better by now.”

Everyone frowned when Kevin got up on stage with CJ. “So as many of you know, we have a VERY special guest in the house tonight: The 5th member of the Backstreet Boys, Mr. Kevin Richardson!”

The crowd screamed with excitement.

“He also has his lovely wife, Kristin, and his beautiful son, Mason, here tonight.”

The audience cheered again. CJ looked down at Mason, who was reaching up for her. Kevin saw too and pulled him up on stage. He ran and grabbed CJ’s leg. The audience ‘aww’ed.

“I know most of you are wondering how I know Kevin and his family. Well, I’m going to tell you.”

Brian, Howie, and AJ gasped. “Shit! She’d better not,” AJ whispered. They all watched as CJ picked Mason up and held him. He wrapped his arms around her neck and laid his head on her shoulder.

“I know Kevin and little Mason here because I live next door to them and I’ve been Mason’s babysitter since he was born.”

Mason snuggled his head on CJ. “We’re very close, just like family. That’s why I’m so excited to have them here today. They’ve been hanging around all day so I’ve gotten some time with them. I haven’t seen them at all in close to four months. Mason was my first real fan too.” She kissed the top of his head and the audience ‘aww’ed again. “Kevin actually recommended me to the guys after my YouTube videos started blowing up and people wanted me to go touring. I told him not to, but he did it anyway. Now I’m here singing for you guys. So I just wanted to tell Kevin ‘thank you’ for not listening to me.”

The audience laughed.

“Ok, so the boys are going to be coming out shortly. But would y’all do me a small favor? Please?”

The audience clapped.

“Ok, please respect Kevin, Kristin and Mason’s space during the show, just like you would anyone else you don’t know at the show.”

Kevin leaned over and whispered in her ear.

“Kevin said he’ll be happy to hang around and take pictures and sign autographs after the show.”

The audience cheered and Kevin leaned over and whispered in CJ’s ear again.

“That is if I’m free to watch Mason.”

The audience laughed.

“How about it buddy? Just you and me tonight?”

Mason squealed and hugged CJ tighter. “Yay! Auntie J-Bird!”

CJ blushed. “He calls me auntie. I told you, we’re just like family.”

The audience ‘aww’ed again.

“Ok, enough of me talking. I’m going to get off the stage so the guys you really came to see can do their thang. I’m CJ Carter. Thanks for listening. Goodnight everybody.”

The audience cheered as Kevin took Mason and CJ ran off.

CJ stopped when she got to the guys backstage. “You three aren’t mad, are you? Kevin and I had discussed this prior to the show. It was all for Mason’s benefit. He would’ve gotten upset if I hadn’t hugged him afterwards like I always do when I sing for him. So Kevin and I came up with that. Please don’t be mad. Say you’re not mad at me!”

They all looked at each other then at her. AJ wrapped his arm around her shoulders. “Well, we were at first when we thought you weren’t thinking and did it. Then again we thought you were gonna spill the family secret. But now, no. We’re not mad. Actually, we’re relieved.”

CJ’s eyes popped out. “Relieved? Really?”

Brian chuckled. “Yea, of course. Now we have a good explanation for how you know Kevin and how we,” Brian made air quotes, “discovered you. So yes, not mad and relieved.”

CJ sighed in relief. “Good. Ok. Well, go knock ‘em dead like always. See you after the show.” She smiled at Nick, grabbed her phone from Leighanne, the walked off.

Nick watched CJ watch away. He turned his head to see Leighanne tapping his shoulder. “Can I talk to you for a minute?”

Brian stared. “But Baby, we gotta be on stage in a few minutes.”

Leighanne nodded and smiled. “I know. It will only take a minute. Come with me please, Nick.”

Nick followed Leighanne to a little corner away from people.

“So Leighanne, to what do I owe the honor of this special before-show private conversation?”

Leighanne rolled her eyes. “Don’t get smart with me, Nickolas. I have a question for you, then some friendly advice.”

“Question AND advice? Must be serious.”

Leighanne slapped the back of Nick’s head. “Don’t start with me just because you’re feeling cocky right now. This is serious.”

“Sorry. Sorry. What’s up?”

“Nick, do you plan on seeing this through or are you only chasing J because she keeps turning you down?”

Nick wiped the smirk off his face. “I plan on staying with this. I truly want to be with CJ. I don’t know where it will take us, but I know I want to find out.”

Leighanne smiled. “Good, then listen to me on this, ok?”

Nick nodded.

“Slow it down a bit. Don’t be aggressive. Do one of two things: One, woo her like in the olden days. Flirt and be a charmer, but not aggressively. Or two, and I hate this option, but I know it might just work with CJ: Put your interest elsewhere. Go on and talk to her, but don’t flirt or anything like that. Got it?”

Nick nodded. “But Leighanne…”

“Nick, it’s time to go on stage.”

“He’s coming, Baby. We’re all done here.”


	26. Chapter 26

CJ listened to the applause as the show came to an end. She watched everyone from the side of the stage. She smiled as the guys ran off stage. Nick came running towards her. “Hi,” he said.

“Hey there.” She smiled at Nick. “So can we talk now? I have to get something off my chest.”

Nick nodded. “Yea. Just give me a a bit so I can shower and change. Ok?” Nick said breathlessly.

“Sounds good. I’ll wait for you in my dressing room. See you soon.” CJ gave Nick a huge smile, then turned and headed to her room. “So what exactly am I going to tell him?” She got to her room and flung herself on the couch. “First, I’ll call Al and tell him about my epiphany. That’ll kill some time.”

CJ pulled out her phone and dialed Al. “Hey, it’s me. I’ve got so much to tell you.”

Nick stepped out of the shower and dried himself off. He pulled on some jeans and a t-shirt. He looked himself over in the mirror then dashed off to CJ’s room.

Nick stopped outside her door and took a deep breath and let it out slowly then knocked on the door. CJ opened it and smiled at him. “Give me a minute, ok?”

Nick nodded.

He watched her walk back to the couch and pick up her phone. “I’m back. Yea, it was him. Ok. I remember. I will. Ok. Love you too, Al. Bye.”

CJ turned to face Nick, sat down and motioned for Nick to sit next to her.

He walked over and sat down and stared at her. “So what’s up CJ?”

She scooted closer to him and took his hand in hers then smiled up at him sweetly. “I need to apologize to you. I have been very quick to judge you and your actions based on something… Well someone I knew a long time ago. It was unfair of me to react to you based on that.”

Nick stared at her. If CJ was going to open up, he’d better do it too. “I need to tell you something too. I’ve had issues with any sort of commitment since I was young. I don’t like being with someone because I worry they’ll leave. So when I started getting close to you it scared the shot out of me. I haven’t felt anything like that… this in a long time. So I ran off and did the DUMBEST thing I have ever done in my life. CJ, I never meant to hurt you, but it made me figure out a lot about myself.”

CJ smiled at him. “So in other words we were both stupid, huh?”

Nick laughed. “I guess so.”

CJ smiled again. “Then can we try this again? Take things a little slower? I’d like to see what could happen between us, Nick. That is if you’re willing to try too. I want to see you for you, not who I see in my head.”

Nick stared at her. He couldn’t believe his ears. There was only one way to answer her. “I’d love that too, my little princess.”

“Great. Then how about…” CJ stopped and her jaw dropped. She stared at Nick. “Wh… What did you just say?”

Nick gave her a quirky, sexy smile. “I said I’d love that too.” He took time to enunciate the last three words. “My. Little. Princess.”

CJ’s eyes popped. “How’d you… How can… Carrot?”

Nick nodded. “I wasn’t kidding when I said I figured out a lot about myself. CJ, when you went running out of my room that day, I knew it all then. I had dreamt about my princess and her leaving, and then others leaving. So when you turned and left, I tried yelling for my princess to come back and it all became clear. I’ve wanted to tell you ever since but you’ve be…”

CJ pulled Nick’s face to hers and kissed him slow, sweet, yearning. She put her arms around his neck and pulled him into her. Nick closed his eyes and gave into her. He put his arms around her waist and pulled her as close to him as possibly could.

CJ sat up on her knees and pushed Nick back, pressing him into the couch. She crawled onto him and kissed him more, harder, deeper, needy.

Nick took all the will power he had and pushed her up. “Whoa, CJ.”

She opened her eyes and stared at him. “I… Sorry. I said we needed to take it slow, didn’t I?”

Nick laughed. “Yea. And this is beginning to look a little like that first night.”

CJ got off Nick and sat down next to him. “Yea.” She giggled. “Oh, damn it!” CJ started swearing under her breath.

“What? What’s wrong CJ?”

CJ looked at Nick. “I guess I owe Al some money now.”

Nick looked at her, confused.

“Do you remember that lunch we had with Al and he made me a bet?”

Nick nodded.

“Well, he bet me that you were Carrot. I thought he was just pulling his shit to be funny. But I think he saw something that I didn’t… or couldn’t. It explains why he was SOOO mad at you.”

Nick laughed. “Wow. That’s… That’s crazy. But listen, if we’re going to…” He looked CJ up and down. “… take it slow, I need to leave… NOW. And I’m going to leave. And I’ll see you soon.”

Nick got up and left, closing the door behind him. CJ just stared after him then someone knocked on her door. “Who the fuck could that be?”

CJ walked over to the door and opened it. There stood Nick with a single rose.

“Miss Jaseraie Carter, would you do me the extreme honor of going on an actual, proper date with me?”

CJ smiled a toothy grin. “Of course I will, Mr. Carter.”

Nick handed her the rose, then grabbed her hand and kissed it. “Great. Then I’ll see you tonight at 8:00 sharp. Be prepared for a fun-filled… slow evening.” Nick smiled at her.

“I can’t wait Carrot. No! Nick. See you tonight.”

CJ smiled as Nick walked away. She closed the door and leaned up against it. “Starting over. This should be good.”


End file.
